Tubes Glorious Tubes And Shit Around The Web

By Michael December 04, 2015 @ 12:00 PM

Samantha-Hoopes-Tries-To-Cover-Her-Big-Cleavage-nextdoormodel-05

Samantha Hoopes is one of those vaguely counted in the Census SI Swimsuit models with a heaving bosom that you feel like you ought to know better. Check back in in a couple decades after kids and the first divorce. You’ll be supervisor of more than one Arby’s by then and you stand a good shot.

Samantha Hoopes grabs her tits just to be decent (Last Men On Earth)

Valentina Georgie Pegorer’s ass is one for the record books. (Egotastic All-Stars)

In Turkey calling the president Gollum can get you thrown in jail. (TMZ)

Lady Gaga actually looks hot in these pics and not like an intergalactic tranny. (Drunken Stepfather)

Mirror, mirror on the wall, these bitches are the hottest of all. (The Chive)

Fear of the Walking Dead’s Alycia Debnam Carey is seriously hot. (Radass)

Lily Aldridge no bra cleavage is out of control. (Hollywood Tuna)

Samantha Hoopes Sells Magic Mike XXL

By Lex June 26, 2015 @ 11:41 AM

Samantha Hoopes Magic Mike XXL Premiere
Going to see Magic Mike doesn’t make you gay. Going to see Magic Mike and insisting it’ll make your girlfriend happy and you’ll get laid, that’s gay. The confident heterosexual male never insists. The Marlboro man never had to declare that he liked to end his ride on the range with a smoke and some pussy. Ask David Spade if he’s banged over two hundred models and he’ll laugh and call it a rumor. Then he’ll smell his fingers and remember them all, sorted by hair color and lawsuit. This is the age of gender fluidity. You can still be my friend, but I’m picking you last in paintball. Stereotyping is how I win trophies.

Photo Credit: FameFlynet

Samantha Hoopes Wins Entourage Premiere

By Lex June 02, 2015 @ 12:02 PM

Samantha Hoopes Wins Entourage Premiere
It’s hard to believe they’re still making movies showcasing hot girls in a digital age when you can click to Egotastic and see the same actresses naked. The soundtrack will be hot too. You can get all that on Spotify in eleven seconds. Entourage came up in in 2004 before broadband was wide and we used to watch jpegs load from the top down on CRT monitors. That was no way to jerk off. We were like animals. It’s 2015. If you’re spending $100 million to trade on a fading TV show name and show off chicks in bikinis you’ve got competition. I remember when nobody wished for an Entourage movie and somebody made it claiming everybody wanted it. Bet the under.

Photo Credit: FameFlynet/Getty

Samantha Hoopes Is Very Good At Modeling Lingerie (VIDEO)

By Travis March 28, 2014 @ 11:00 AM

Samantha Hoopes was one of the new faces from this year’s Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue, and there is very little doubt that this woman is going to be a star. She recently teamed up with Love Haus Lingerie for a special photo shoot, and she is really quite talented at posing in sexy underwear and looking at a camera. If there was a prize for such accomplishments, I’d strongly recommend that Samantha receive it, because I’ve watched this video several hundred times this morning, and nothing else in the world matters right now. At least until another model makes a lingerie video, which will probably happen any minute.

Samantha Hoopes Models Lingerie For SS 2014 Guess

By Lex February 12, 2014 @ 12:21 PM

Samantha Hoopes Models Lingerie For SS 2014 Guess

Photo Credit: Guess