Buxom blonde mom Brooke Lajiness banged her daughter's fourteen year old classmate fifteen times in the back of her car. Turns out that's illegal in Michigan.

Devon Windsor is one of the lesser renown Victoria's Secret model. On the upside, that likely means a smaller DiCaprio and Bieber viral footprint.

Myla Dalbesio almost makes the rest of SI's body positive corporate social messaging acceptable.

Jade Pinkett Smith is the best part of the Smith family. When she doesn't speak, she's almost endearing. It's close. 

Elle Fanning can act and she seems happy and has small titties.  She's a true one of a kind in this town.

Kendall Jenner is unbelievably bangable in red lingerie. Even more bangable out of it. I'm such a pig.

High school in Texas hires counselors for boys who DIDN'T get to fuck hot math teacher Haeli Wey. That actually makes sense. (Casey Anthony)

Emily Ratajkowski feels empowered when she makes the decision to show off her body. Bring a sock to handle your feelings of counter-empowerment.

Kylie Jenner has a knack for looking do-able. It probably wasn't lauded on International Women's Day as an inspiring talent, but ask her accountant how it's going.

Canadian teacher used Snapchat to send titty pics to her eighth graders, then she blew a few. Welcome Canada, you're one of us. (Casey Anthony)