PARIS HILTON HAS CHANGED

The Daily Mail UK caught Paris Hilton leaving her house yesterday while holding a copy of the Bible and a self help book named "The Power Of Now".  The Mail says:

If ever there was a cry for help this is it. Paris is desperately trying to convince judges that she's a good girl who would never, ahem, break the law.

Paris must be blowing a bookstore manager these days because she seems to have one or two or three every time she leaves the house lately. And I think it's admirable she's turning to God in her time of crisis, but unfortunately my "kill Paris Hilton" prayers almost definitely got there first, so it presents a bit of a quandary. And if I've learned anything from my Jesus figurines, it's that God answers prayers.  He also "don't make no junk" and Jesus enjoys playing soccer while laughing and building birdhouses, also while laughing.