Seeing so many older B-movie and former soap actresses taking their tits to revealing digital media shoots makes me wonder what the fuck happened to these women before high speed modems. READ MORE

Vogue declared this chick one of the top models of the 2000's. She entered the decade at nine years of age, so that's probably worth a Special Victims Unit investigation. READ MORE

Swim Week in Miami was invented as an excuse to assemble attractive young women to walk around half naked. So similar origins to the University of Florida. READ MORE

This chick with the amazing ass broke up with Klay Thompson because he was cheating on her. That's a technical impossibility if you have any adult level sense of how the world works. Or you've ever watched Animal Planet... READ MORE

Somebody invented Swim Week in Miami for when the scent of Cuban armpit is especially strong. It's a time in mid-July for thousands of women designing nearly identical bikinis all stitched in the same garment factory in The Killing... READ MORE

Emma Roberts has Eric Roberts blood coursing through her veins. She's playing with borrowed time. That beat down she put on her boyfriend is a classic sign her close associates will choose to ignore when interviewed as to how... READ MORE

Sex with the same partner over and over again is pretty fucking boring. That's why no man conducted himself thusly for the first 99.9% of human history. Monogamy cries out to invent shit like leather straps and ball gags... READ MORE

If mothers could set aside straight-faced 'you can be an engineer' chats with their teen daughters and teach them how to secure their bikini tops after sunbathing on their stomaches, they'd be imparting a far more practical life skill.... READ MORE

There are pluses and minuses to being seventy with a still attractive forty-something wife and three attractive teen daughters. Cialis and a chick in your bed who still looks good naked is a big something. But older guy muscle... READ MORE

Every model who's done her time on the DiCaprio line charts a different path upon release. Some get a taste of the sweet life and simply can't go back. Toni Garnn dabbled in independence before realizing paying rent is... READ MORE