If I was making a scary ghost movie I would definitely cast Jessica Biel, because black guys love movies and girls with big asses and they're hilariously scared of ghosts.  I can't remember where I was going with that... READ MORE

Jessica Biel (seen here spending Christmas in Hawaii) has the power to turn gay men straight, and if that came out as a compliment I should probably rephrase it, because what I mean is that she’s built like Ray... READ MORE

Jessica Biel is so perfect she should be frozen and studied. Or at least used as a breeder. Some of you may scoff at the moral implications of something like that, to which I would fake a cough while... READ MORE

Damn. Jessica Biel has been famous for like ten years now, but …  when the hell did this happen.  I’ve seen her ass a thousand times, I never noticed that it looked like this.  And it’s a good thing... READ MORE

Jessica Biel was at the club Lotus in New York Thursday night and various reports from the party claim she was nice enough to make out with another girl.  Biel and her friends drank Grey Goose and soda until... READ MORE