Even These Tired Armenian Whores Couldn't Make the VMAs Interesting

I don't know what the hell happened at most of this year's VMA Awards. I fell asleep when Beyonce was singing something really loud and woke up two hours later and she was still fucking singing. Then she had a staged kiss with Jay Z and slapped him when she saw he was holding a baby she didn't remember having. The show opened strong when everybody got to pretend that Nicki Minaj's wardrobe malfunction wasn't setup or...

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Selena Gomez Picked A Great Dress For The VMAs

A lot of semi- to kind-of-sort-of-famous men and women showed up to last night's MTV Video Music Awards wearing the dumbest fucking outfits that you'll probably ever see in your lives, and that includes Miley Cyrus, who dressed like a pre-teen boy from 1983 while sticking her tongue out because people are assholes and tell her that's cool. But none of them mattered after Selena Gomez showed up with one of her tits...

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Katy Perry And Riff Raff Have The Same Stylist

I don't know which is worse: A) That Katy Perry showed up to the MTV Video Music Awards last night with her breasts completely covered up by the rug from a late-70s porn set, B) That Katy Perry rocked the stupid rich white lady wearing a grill schtick less than a week after Madonna's old, veiny ass did it, or C) That Katy Perry stood on the red carpet and made the same stupid face with her dumb $1,000 grill as Riff...

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