Brooke Shields Is a Crappy Escort

Richard Lugner is that Austrian mall developerwho pays half a millionto oneHollywoodcelebrity chick every year to be his date to the grand Viennese Opera opening. Fifty bucks gets you a street hooker.Half a million buys you a B-list celebrityand a vague promise of a happy ending. The parts are dusty but the instinct finely oiled. In the past Lugner has invited Paris Hilton and Carmen Electra and Kim Kardashian and...read more

Elisabetta Canalis Date For Hire

This old Austrian billionaire might just be my hero. He just married that German blowup doll one-quarter his age to be his regular pecker wetter, but he's still doling out the 500K paychecks to get celebrity chicks in low cut dresses to be his date to the big opera events. I don't think he gets to old man pudge bang George Clooney's ex-girlfriend, but a few gropes and titty touches are probably in the contract. It's...read more

Richard Lugner Marries Younger

There's no ambitious escort taping racist comments by billionaires in Austria. They all say racist shit and everybody raises their glass in cheers. That's why octogenarian billionaires can receive tit jobs from 20-something barbie dolls without fear of being extorted. Richard Lugner is the construction industry magnate who paid Kim Kardashian half a mill to be his date to the Viennese Ball last year. He griped when...read more

Kim Kardashian Is One Super Crappy Escort

Kim Kardashian has to be the world's most disappointing hooker. She's the classic underachiever, a high draft pick that simply doesn't pan out in the world of whoredom. Kim accepted $500,000 for a date night with Richard Lugner, the Austrian billionaire who has previously paid the same silly sum for Carmen Electra and Paris Hilton to be his date to the annual Vienna Opera Ball. Maybe the geezer gets a dry handy at the...read more