AJ Clemente made his big debut as an anchor for KFYR, the NBC affiliate in Bismarck, North Dakota, yesterday and if establishing himself as a household name with his very own viral video was his goal, then he is already a huge success. As the broadcast returned from commercial, AJ could be heard muttering, “Fuckin’ shit” as his co-anchor Van Tieu talked about something that didn’t involve curse words.
Shortly after AJ’s Twitter account was temporarily suspended, KFYR’s news director, Monica Hannan quickly issued an apology on Facebook and then a bunch of people whose lives are so boring that they comment on a Bismark TV station’s Facebook page either complained about the naughty words or they showed support for the anchor.
Either way, it’s not a big fucking deal, and if anything it made the guy seem more human, which is something that the news lacks these days. For example, Fox News’ Megyn Kelly would be a lot more tolerable if she just took her shirt off already.
While it’s fun to make fun of Justin Bieber’s current mini-meltdown, as he runs around London shirtless and plays “Hold me back” with his giant bodyguards in front of the paparazzi, the guy actually came from humble beginnings by showcasing actual talent. He worked his ass off while his single mom supported his dream, and he was fortunate enough to catch the eye of Usher. The rest is just history for a 19-year old panty-soaking money machine.
But now, in an effort to find the next Justin Bieber, Sony is just skipping that whole “actual talent” part and going straight for the cloning process with a 12-year old Danish boy named Benjamin Lasnier.
Despite a musical background limited to YouTube lip-synchs, Lasnier – who made himself an idol without pretending to any talent at all – is now signed to Sony, working with top producers to crack America. But is there more to him than just a pretty face?
“Every talent starts from scratch,” says Sony A&R Mads Kjaergaard. If Lasnier can credibly establish himself and leverage his fanbase “there is no limit to where he could go”. (The Guardian)
This kid was given a record deal because he posts lip-syncing videos to YouTube and he has 750,000 followers on Instagram. It’s not even clear if he even had to single note before Sony threw a bag of cash at him. For all we know, his natural voice could sound like this hippo shitting, but it won’t matter because producers will just autotune and process his voice until he sounds decent enough to sell to little girls for $10 an album.
Over the weekend, the above video of a drunk asshole picking fights at SXSW started making its rounds, becoming one of the big viral video hits of 2013 so far. The main reason for its success, aside from the obvious joy we all take in watching someone get knocked the fuck out, has been that people love to argue about whether or not he deserved to be sucker punched by a guy that he wasn’t even starting shit with.
As you can see, this guy was being a dick to at least two people in a rather large crowd, and why he chose to start bitch-punching (or maybe dance-punching?) them is a mystery. Regardless, he’s clearly the aggressor in this situation, so he definitely deserved to be knocked out. Did he deserve to be sucker-punched, though? And is the guy who hit him a hero or a pussy?
I say it’s warranted, especially for punching the guy in the black shirt right in the nose, as he was crying for him to stop. No pride is won in hitting an easy target. I stopped feeling bad for black shirt, though, when he kicked camo shorts while he was unconscious. I guess it’s just a judgment call, as far as who is right and who is wrong, but I’m sure the guy in the camo shorts learned his lesson and definitely didn’t go out the next night and try to pick a fight all over again.
Tiger Woods has a new commercial for Nike, set to air during the Masters starting tomorrow, and it’s a simple black and white shot of Tiger while his (dead) dad does a voice over.
It’s a good ad, but if you have a friend who’s really stoned you can ask him how is Tiger talking without moving his lips, or even better pretend like you don’t hear any voices, and watch him freak out.
Of course when I said, “who wants look at Lindsay any more than they have to”, I forgot the footage of her falling down last night. Everyone can enjoy something like that. Especially this one. It’s not an innocent stumble. It’s like a Home Alone movie. She hits the ground so completely, it’s as if she was tied to a safe and thrown off the roof. If you didn’t know better you’d think someone was just dumped out of their wheelchair.
Black and white alike all hate John Mayer now after his comments about women and race were published in Playboy yesterday. The only person who seems happy about it is Jessica Simpson in this TMZ video, because him saying she was a tiger in the sack is the best press she’s gotten in about two years. Still, it’s nice to see the races come together and agree on something, in this case that John Mayer is a jackass when he tries to be introspective. Beating up John Mayer could be the bridge that brings black and white together. That rock doesn’t care what color you are, my brothers.