Star magazine claimed in an email newsletter yesterday that The Most Beautiful Woman In The World might be pregnant. Star says:
She has been spotted wearing baggy clothing, ordering big boxes of sweet chocolaty treats, and overheard complaining of lower back pain and nausea during filming. Her rep denies that these tell-tale signs are signaling that Kirsten is a mom-to-be, but her interest in co-star Tobey Maguire’s newborn daughter suggests otherwise. Kirsten has become fascinated by details about the pregnancy of Tobey’s fiancée, Jennifer Meyer, asking how she dealt with morning sickness. When Tobey replied that Jennifer felt awful throughout the entire nine months, Kirsten just groaned, “Oh great!”
There's no way this is true. It's just not. First of all, I'm not even positive she's a girl. Or entirely human. The kid would have hooves and a forked tongue. The only reason she was complaining is because she's Kirsten Dunst, and Kirsten Dunst is a whiny bitch. But, whatever, based on trophies I won in Science, I know for a fact that robots from the future would come back and kill her before she ever came to term, so we're good.
Kill it!!!
No need to kill it… I’m pretty sure teeth like that are good for only one thing: eating babies. She’ll take care of it!
This kid would most certainly grow to be a snaggletoothed warlord who would then send vicious bloodthirsty robots back in time to annihilate all of mankind. Should we stand idily by and let this happen? I for one say no. I’m going to sit.
This is one of the three signs of the apocalypse people! The second is Firecrotch being dumped for Paris Hilton.
Are we sure snaggletooth isn’t just a retarted looking vampire?
OK here are the reasons this is nonsense. 1) She looks like shit and wears baggy clothes because she is the Snaggletooth. 2) She coos over babies because she is a female (or possibly because she wants to eat it). 3) She eats chocolate because she is female. 4) Complaining because as was pointed out she is a whiney snaggletoothed bitch. 5) There is no way anyone could toss their beans up her chuff as no penis could stay hard or any man climax when trying to shag this monster. QED biatch!
what chick doesn’t get all giddy over babies? oh wait. i don’t get giddy over them but i also don’t get giddy over swamp land in florida. sure they are silky soft and have that baby lotion smell but those fuckers drain your wallet more than the government. plus i don’t want my vag blown to smithereens so i’ll pass. i can’t go for that. no. nah. no can do.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=somjcZvA1fY&mode=related&search=
see this is how they get you with cutsie footage like this.
any more Britney-Paris news today? It would be a blessing, whatever it is, if it pushed the banner pic on THIS article down, down, off my screen.
I’m not ashamed to admit it: I would impregnate her Sn’tooth. In a heartbeat. Think about it, people! The chance to give birth to the last of the dragonriders?!?!?! I’m all over that. Bax… Sijyn… Fetch me my wineskin. Give a dying man a final drink… I have raised you well and you have both grown up to be brave and strong. But only one of you can be… the last of the dragonriders. The other must die. Tonight. Join together in combat. Use your snaggley teeth… Fight to the death, my brave children! The future of the kingdom is at stake.
I’ll bet she’ll do everything she can to hide it’s mark.
Fear not, folks. She’s definitely NOT pregnant. She wears baggy clothing because she’s doughy and doesn’t want her rolls on display (thank goodness for THAT). And it’s no surprise that if rolly-polly Dunst is pounding down “…big boxes of sweet chocolaty treats,” she’s gonna feel nausea. Of course, eating babies might also cause that nausea, so if I were Tobey, I’d keep the kid the f**k away from Fang-a-licious. As for the lower back pain, I’d attribute that to the stretching of the spine she endures when the full moon hits and the fur starts growing, but that’s just my opinion.
Aaron, first Snags would give birth to the last of the dragonriders – only the last dragon. Second, it would actually look something like this –> http://www.tvacres.com/images/fangface2.jpg
Robert… I’m not sure if I should curse you for shattering my dreams or thank you for saving me from ever having to be in the position of wearing an orange baseball cap backwards. The conflict is too great. Someone fetch me my wineskin while I plot my next move. I’m going back into my tent…
beatlejuice. beatlejuice. beatlejuice.
If by horrible chance she is pregnant, could it be Orlando Bloom’s baby? I hope not. That would be such a waste of precious Orlando sperm.
Robert – woudn’t that pic be her and Michael J. Fox’s kid? (remember “Teen Wolf”? American cinema at it’s finest!)
And n0thingface, it’s “Beetlejuice”…what you have there is what you would get if the lads from Liverpool were run down in the crosswalk whilst shooting the cover photo for Abbey Road.
@Ass Tagger
Agreed, I would much rather see (if I was *forced* to see, like if I was confined in a steel chair with my eyelids sewn open) Snaggletooth in baggy clothes than, say, a Spears/Lohan-like crotchpic. Although I hear that the Secret Service has found Snaggletooth’s crotchpics to be more inhumane than waterboarding.
The kid would have hooves and a forked tongue. — Brendon, how many times must I offer myself to you before you’ll accept? Seriously though, all of todays posts were winners including this one. As far as Dunst goes, if her being pregnant will keep Brendon snarking her ugly ass then so be it.
I just miss all the hot pics of his true love, Jessica.