Just weeks after separating from some nobody, former something or other Marilyn Manson is now dating some chick. Umm, 19-year-old actress Evan Rachel Wood. Whoever the hell that is. Manson is 38. I can only imagine the shock I would feel if I knew who any of these people were or why they were famous. Thankfully People magazine does, and they say,
…his relationship with the Thirteen actress was a factor in the Dec. 29 divorce filing by Dita Von Teese, 34, Manson's wife of one year. "Dita is heartbroken, she didn't see this coming," says a source close to the burlesque dancer and MAC cosmetics model.
Dear God I hope the rest of the day isn't like this. There might as well be stories about my paperboy. The only interesting thing related to this dates back to this blind item that the New York Post ran seven months ago:
"Which Hollywood hellcat supposedly has a sick sexual fetish for something called the 'Donkey Punch?' The starlet was having sex with a much-older boyfriend a while back and begged her shocked bedmate to 'hit me in the face' at the peak of their passionate lovemaking."
That was reportedly about Wood when she was dating Ed Norton. He was 36, she was 18 and confused about what rough sex really is. Girls seem to think rough sex is when a handsome stranger with a long wind swept mane of hair rips open her blouse, then covers her eyes with a velvet blindfold and feeds her strawberries on a pirate ship. A more realistic scenario is for the princess to say "donkey punch" because she heard it on Sex and the City one time, then she hears a pop, then everything gets dark, then she wakes up 15 hours later wondering why her asshole hurts.
Evan is a pretty hot guy.
Who the fukk names there daughter ‘Evan’?
She’s officially ruined.
Manson separated from a ‘nobody’?? Brendon you’re a complete fag. Manson was with Dita Von Teese, famous strip tease artist (google it) who is one of the hottest chicks walking the earth (if a bit gothic). I’m disgusted.
Dita von Teese is one of the hottest chicks walking the earth? To each his own, I guess, but she looks like a fucking corpse. This Evan Rachel Wood chick is a step up if you ask me.
Brendan, this is like the fourth time you’ve used that “wind-swept mane, blindfold, strawberries, pirate ship” gag. Just saying.
Either way, she’s fucking hot.
I concede Dita Von Teese is a little pale, she could use some vitamin D but her body is truly banging. Thats pretty much the extent of my point.
The _Doctor is right (although, Brendon is not a fag since he became a Scientologist). Dita is one of my fantasy girls, so be careful whose dreams you dash on your rock-hard abs. And yes, she is ruined. And blind.
Seriously, Manson left one of the hottest women to not be a slut for publicity to do a 19 year old that vaguely looks like a guy?
That’s not…right.
Not reading this very carefully, but this chick wants someone to punch her in the face then fuck her in the ass? I’m in.
How does this ghoul get these chicks?
Manson didnt leave her, she filed divorce from his fug ass.
the best things in life really are free…
Doesn’t Manson have a breast implant in the middle of his chest or something? I’m just sayin’, that guy’s a fucking freak.
The Donkey Punch doesn’t happen in the face. It’s in the back of the girls head with doggie style. Besides you don’t ASK for the Donkey Punch, you just receive the Donkey Punch. It’s a surprise, see? Sheesh!
“Manson and Von Teese were married last fall at Castle Gurteen in Ireland at the home of Austrian artist Gottfried Helnwein. Manson wore an outfit designed by John Galliano while Von Teese wore Vivienne Westwood. Lisa Marie Presley, Ozzy and Sharon Osbourne, film director David Lynch and “Matrix” star Keanu Reeves attended the ceremony.” WTF was Keanu doing there?!?!?!
I’m confused… what exactly makes her look like a guy? I don’t see anything.
I kinda lost interest in this story after the first paragraph due to taking my own advice and googled Dita Von Tease, thus a mighty (yes, mighty) erection did ensue. The bit about the donkey punch, Ed Norton and pirate ships went over my head a bit. Being practically a child still, this chick probably thought it would be fun to bang a guy who has halloween every day of the year.
Why does every story about these retarded people infer that “Dita Von Teese, famous strip tease artist” wanted to play June Cleaver?
Gotta love how the NYP can’t get what a Donkey Punch is. It’s a bit like your Grandma explaining a blumpkin…
Wow, I guess after she made “Thirteen” she felt like her real life was somehow incomplete. She’ll probably get tired of Manson’s shtick real quick– all his other lady-friends have.