March 23, 2007 | celebrity | editor | 0 Comments

Star Magazine and the National Enquirer have teamed up to solve the riddle behind the mysterious death of Anna Nicole Smith.  I bet the result is shocking!

Anna Nicole Smith died with a toxic level of the sleeping medication chloral hydrate in her system.  The world exclusive details come days before Broward County, Fla., Chief Medical Examiner Joshua Perper will hold a press conference to announce the former Playboy Playmate's cause of death … Anna Nicole (also) had a raging blood infection. The infection was caused by an unsterilized needle and contributed to her death.  The infection was so serious, it would have killed her if she had not overdosed.

Wow, this bitch was like a white trash Rasputin.  She should have died years ago for 50 different reasons but somehow never did.  She was like one of the X-Men.  She was basically Wolverine, with superhuman healing powers and big tits instead of claws and the ability to whine for hours.  She was so high and drunk all the dam time, normal drugs and disease were no match for what her immune system had already conquered.  You could shoot her in the heart with a poison arrow and she would just stand there.  "Stoopp itt … c'mon, you're bein … jerk … iii don’t … wannaaa … hey, do we have ice cream…"  Then she’d pass out because that’s what she was gonna do anyway and wake up 30 hours later with no damage except some vague memory about Ben and Jerry shooting her with an arrow.

Tags: anna nicole smith

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