The New York Daily News says that the weird marriage between Brittany Murphy and Simon Monjack (this handsome devil) is getting even weirder. Murphy is telling friends that she is being stalked by a powerful Hollywood figure and this mystery man may have even kidnapped Monjack for 10 days back in April. Murphy eventually had to pay a ransom for Monjacks return, although it's not clear who she paid the money too, because the time that Monjack was allegedly being kidnapped coincides with the 10 days he was in jail for overstaying his visa (he's British). The News says:
A source who used to work for the perky star says she talks darkly of "a high-powered Hollywood player" who is allegedly stalking her.
And when her then-boyfriend, Simon Monjack, disappeared for 10 days in April, Murphy claimed he had been kidnapped by agents of this mysterious figure, says the source.
"When he came back, he had head injuries," says the former insider. "He was pale and sometimes had trouble standing."
Not only that, but the former staffer also claims Murphy said she was unable to pay him because the money had been used for ransom.
Monjack is apparently pretty shady and owes various people lots of money, but does that mean he lied to Murphy about a kidnapping to steal her money? Sure, why not.
first? no way
Yes way, Garth.
Gullible, maybe, fuckable, sure.
The moral of the story is if you find someone hot and really stupid and rich you should marry them. And that is why I am now a married man. If I ever do something bad I can claim aliens/mutants/terroists did it and it will all be forgiven.
Yay!
I'll bet this high-stakes Hollywood mogul sounds a lot like Monjack would if he were speaking into the receiver with a sock over the phone. It's uncanny, really.
I'd plow
Hey Brittney i need you to help me. ive just been bitten on the end of my penis by a very poisonous snake and if you dont suck out the venom, I could die.
Yes, I know it looks like I have an erection, its just swollen from the toxicity of the venom.
How will you know if it works? Well, youll taste the venom coming out, of course.
In the banner pic she looks like the Joker about to suck me off. I… am… BATMAN!
:-)
hmmmmm i always knew the British were sneaky
She told her staff she spent her money on ransom? More like she spent it on oats and sugar cubes. The only thing she'd be stalked by is Seabiscuit looking for some relief.
This just in
"Another starlett dumb as shit!"
And now back to our regular broadcast
Monjack has perkier tits than Britney Spears
It should read "Brittany Murphy is Gullible, Fugly". Then again, I don't know…she looks like she'd be a dynamo in bed. But those goofy looking coke-whore eyes would probably make me perform horribly anyway…
damn, someone throw the bitch a sandwitch. starvation leads to WHACK ATTACKS.
I totally believe this story, given the absolutely reliable source–
(a) unnamed
(b) former employee
(c) who didn't get paid
No way somebody like that would make up a story that gives the impression that his former, dead-beat boss is a stupid git.
Ladies, Here is your role model, now get me a cocktail.
Isn't she the voice of Luanne Platter? It all makes sense now.
Deano, brilliant.
Love those MOOBS!
The only demon that possesses her besides her husband is the one in this photograph.
MAN CANS!!!! that's sexy… like Brit's muff *shudders*