RANDOM MORNING STUFF

AMANDA HOLDEN FOUND A DEAD BODY – Amanda Holden – the hot POA judge on the Simon Cowell show, "Britain's Got Talent" – was on a morning jog yesterday when she found a dead body hanging from a noose in a tree.  A Scotland Yard spokesman said the dead man has yet to be identified, then added, "there were no suspicious circumstances surrounding the death".  Nothing suspicious?  Scotland Yard must have ways of raising the recently dead because I can't imagine someone hanging in the middle of London was part of the plan.  DONDA WEST DIED FROM PLASTIC SURGERY – Kanye West's mother, Donda West, died after complications from liposuction and a breast reduction.  The doctor who performed the surgery says he was not responsible for her death, but that she may have died from a heart attack, pulmonary embolism or massive vomiting.  Nearly 200 people die every year from plastic surgery complications, or about 1 out of every 60,000.  Ugly people should still get it though.  It's worth the risk.  Being hot is awesome.  They don't even make me pay taxes.  I may even be immortal.  The only downside is I have to avoid stuff like mirrors and shiny metal, even lakes and stuff, or else I might see my reflection and fall in love.  Because I'm so handsome, you see.THE VICTORIAS SECRET FASHION SHOW IS HERE – The Victoria's Secret Fashion Show will have almost 30 models this year (including Heidi Klum, Miranda Kerr, Karolina Kurkova, Adriana Lima, Alessandra Ambrosio, Izabel Goulart, Selita Ebanks and Marisa Miller) and the big names kicked off a week of hype with a special Virgin America flight into LAX yesterday.  Tomorrow, the models will be on hand as Victoria’s Secret will receive a star on Hollywood Boulevard, just in front of the Kodak Theatre.  The fashion show will be held later this week at the Kodak, and penises will be held by nerds around the world.