RANDOM STUFF

BRITNEY TO PLAY THE MOM OF JESUS – French producer Phillippe Rebboah wants Britney Spears to play the Virgin Mary in a new satire titled "Sweet Baby Jesus." The producer told Us Weekly he plans to shoot the film in March, and that Spears is "reviewing the script."  Britney's a good mom, so I think people would like a movie where she's the mom of Jesus.  Because what could go wrong if you gave Britney a baby with magic powers?  

BRITNEYS DIET IS TOXIC!  (GET IT?  LIKE THE SONG!) – “When you take a look at Britney Spears and her behavior, it’s very frightening,” Dr. Timothy Brantley, a PHD who educates patients on the power of food, told Access. “She’s a person who’s completely addicted to sugar. This is like heroin for a junkie. She’s literally on a roller coaster to hell.”  This story is stupid but it's always awesome when people fuck up the word "literally".  It means the exact opposite of what they want it to mean.  "She's literally on a roller coaster to hell"?  I find that hard to believe. CHARGES DROPPED AGAINST SHIA LABEOUF – Cops arrested LaBeouf last month outside a Walgreens, after workers repeatedly asked him to leave the store because he appeared drunk. When LaBeouf refused, the security guard detained him and called police.  Shia showed up in court this morning to receive the good news — Walgreens does not want to pursue charges against him.  Too bad, because this could have easily won the award for Lamest Hollywood Arrest, solidly trouncing the time Jake Gyllenhall rolled into the crosswalk because he thought a bee was on him.  "Eeeeeeeeee!  Get it off, get it oooffff!"

DON KING IS SMOOTH – This has nothing to do with anything, but it’s hard not to be impressed by the way Don King unapologetically stares at Tila Tequilas ass.  (Photos courtesy of TilasHotSpot.com)