There hasn’t been anything on here about Britney in a few days, but hey guess what, she's still an impossible-to-define moron. The always great Gatecrasher column says:
She flummoxed staff at the Betsey Johnson on Melrose Ave. this month by turning up with a Dolce & Gabbana dress she wanted the store to copy - in all white - to be ready by that evening.
According to a witness, "the staff explained that they didn't have a dressmaker on call who could do it in time." Never mind that the frock she wanted copied wasn't even their label.
"The only thing she wanted to buy in the store was the yellow wig on a mannequin in the window," laughs the source. "The manager eventually agreed to offer it to her for $100."
The manager fucked up. She should have said the wig cost 10 hundred. Or said "it cost this much", then show her a drawing of a duck. Britney has no idea what the hell is going on in the world so she would have just nodded and handed over a black AmEx. Then the manager could hit 9 and then 0's until the keypad broke. And if Britney’s accountant ever questioned it, Britney would say, "I was lead to believe it was on sale for duck. I thought that meant free. I wuz under the impression ducks were free."
i think her forehead is getting bigger
How much is that Peking Duck in the window?
BRITNEY!!!!!! SHOW ME YOUR CLAM!!!!!!!
Is that Britney or Jessica Alba in the banner pic?
Ha ha, made you look.
Jesus, I have motorcross goggles smaller than those!
Nice doilies dress there (however you spell it)
Hey sperm, you ride MX? I ride an 08 yz450f. Honestly guys, I dont see what the big deal is, she seems like every crazy women on the street, she just has a lot of money and people that follow her around
New Reality Show Idea: Bizarre Behavior. Britney and Amy Winehouse compete to see who's the weirdest woman on earth.
But see, here's the best part–they don't know they're on the show! They just act naturally.
Shirley her AmEx card is white, not black.
That cocaine'll stick to just about anything - especially black AmEx cards…
Al Gore, I'm disappointed. Aren't those motocross thingys all bad for the environment and stuff? Don't they put off noxious fumes and disturb the chipmunks when they're hibernating. Unless you're out looking for manbearpig, of course. Then I'd think the bike was an absolute necessity.
02 KTM 250 EXC and I run over all animals on the trails
is the dress nippless?
HEy Sperm Germ, show a little respect for nature.
That hair has a touch of "Librarian" to it. Where's the duck wig?
Maybe those stupid animals could learn to get the fuck out of the way.
The bike puts off lots of pollution and noise. I ride tracks and destroy trails. I also refuse to ride with a spark arrestor even if the forrest is dry. Fuck those animals. And for the last time, what part about climate change do you people not understand? IT doesnt mean the rich give anything up, it means the rest of you will have to go without, have you not been paying attention? You think Leonardo DiCaprio of myself are gonna give up our mansions and yachts? you fucking people, we can afford carbon offsets, a really cool world my rich friends and I thought up one night while drinking the blood of the poor and trying to find a way to convince you all this is real but we can continue to live high on the hog. Fucking peasants, you dont understand anything.
I know I'll get grief for it but I would still hit it and then go buy shit with her black AMEX card. Some might say the word "hero" is too strong to describe a man like me but I still will accept the accolades.
I think it's mean that Adnan and Sam keep themselves amused by sending Britney out on "scavenger hunts."
"Britney, go out and buy me a jar of elbow grease."
"Britney, run down to the store and ask if they have Prince Albert in the can."
"Britney, drive over to Hollywood and pick up some cocaine from Chico."
"Britney, return these used kleenex to CVS."
"Britney, go to the gas station and ask them to change the air in your tires."
The clerk at the store should have told Britney, "I will give you this wig if you will take off your clothes, put a trash can on your head, and walk down the street singing Hit Me Baby One More Time, then run back here as fast as you can."
Britney: "Damn, why dint yew tell me that before? I already did that!"
I was flummoxed once, but I had to pay the hooker an extra 50 bucks.
Fuck, this broad just gets uglier and uglier as time goes on. Then again which broad doesn't? I really wish I could meet her so she could buy me some shit, I'm broke.