COTTONELLE: THE MOVIE

"Marley and Me" had its big splashy Hollywood premiere last night, and you would have to shoot me out of a cannon to get me into this theater because what lunatic thought it would be a good idea to have Jennifer Aniston and Owen Wilson as a young married couple trying to start a family.  Her chin and his nose aren’t exactly features you want to combine, as my clumsy photoshopping proves.  Regardless, while she was there Jenn was of course asked about her GQ cover.  Us magazine says…

At Thursday's Los Angeles premiere of Marley & Me, Jennifer Aniston spoke out for the first time about her naked GQ cover."I wasn't trying to make any statement," said the 39-year-old actress, who wears only a tie on the cover.After a reporter told her she looked hot in the January issue, Aniston replied, "So do you – hottie!"

God I wanna punch that cunt right in her face.  But Katherine Heigl was there last night too and she might be an even worse human being so Jenn may get a pass.  There should be a Saw that puts someone in a room with those two and a gun with one bullet.  Personally I’d kill myself before the videotape even got done explaining the test.

(picture source = getty images)