leave jessica alone!

By brendon January 28, 2009 @ 7:48 AM

Noted women’s rights advocate Ashlee Simpson has taken to her myspace to defend her newly fat and unattractive sister.  Ashlee says:

I am completely disgusted by the headlines concerning my sister's weight. A week after the inauguration and with such a feeling of hope in the air for our country, I find it completely embarrassing and belittling to all women to read about a woman's weight or figure as a headline on Fox News.
All women come in different shapes, sizes, and forms and just because you're a celebrity, there shouldn't be a different standard.
Is this something you would say to your wife, daughter, mother, grandmother, or even a friend?
I seriously doubt it.
How can we expect teenage girls to love and respect themselves in an environment where we criticize a size 2 figure?
Now can we focus on the things that really matter.

Wait, is she implying Jessica is a size 2?  You know what, I don’t even care, what I care about is Jessica getting back to how she looked as Daisy Duke.  This is ridiculous.  How could Jess do this to me?  She might as well have stepped up to my erection and put a cigarette out on it, or slammed it in a book.

wwtdd

(590) Comments

  1. avatar
    Watt(Power) 01/28/2009 07:57

    Jessica is a size 2(00)

    NIGZ!

  2. avatar
    Watt(Power) 01/28/2009 07:58

    FIRST BITCHES! ITS LUPUS!

  3. avatar
    grubber 01/28/2009 07:59

    it’s too much woman for me.

    I’ll be playing guitar hero.

  4. avatar
    Big Smelly Dirt Cock 01/28/2009 07:59

    Shut up lip-synching, no-talent, nose-jobbed twat I’ll make fun of your fat sister all I want.

    If it makes you feel any better I’d still ram my cock into her vagina from behind as I slap that fat ass of hers.

  5. avatar
    Paparazzi Sniper 01/28/2009 07:59

    Hey new guy …how come you never defend yourself when everyone on here cause you phony. If it is really Br3nd0n, why wouldent you tell everyo9ne on your site to “eat a dick” it still is really you. I know you read this….. Chump!!

  6. avatar
    DB's Treasure 01/28/2009 07:59

    I think the meat on them bones fits her well. I’d drill that ass.

  7. avatar
    TopherRyan 01/28/2009 08:00

    Stuff an apple in her mouth and throw her on a spit.

  8. avatar
    Rick (with a silent P) 01/28/2009 08:00

    “She might as well have stepped up to my erection and put a cigarette out on it, or slammed it in a book.”

    Posting dude…that treatment is better than the pointing and giggling mine gets…

    “I’m so ronery
    So ronery
    So ronery and sadry arone”

  9. avatar
    RemSteale 01/28/2009 08:01

    Cushion, Pushin, thats all I got

  10. avatar
    Watt(Power) 01/28/2009 08:01

    You’d drill that ass and the vibrations wouldn’t stop for a week.

  11. avatar
    WhoDeaux 01/28/2009 08:01

    All women come in different shapes, sizes, and forms and just because you’re a celebrity, there shouldn’t be a different standard.

    Stupidest thing I’ve ever heard.

    If celebritites can be ‘the same as us’ then why the fuck do I want to jerk off to pictures of them?

    I can see fat chicks at the car wash. I need my celebs tight and trim and coked out.

    Is this not obvious?

  12. avatar
    The PoolMan 01/28/2009 08:01

    She ate Joaquin

  13. avatar
    DB's Treasure 01/28/2009 08:01

    BSDC, you have a striking resemblance to Jim Carrey from back in his In Living Color days. That aint a knock at you, btw.

  14. avatar
    Topper (Harry) Harley 01/28/2009 08:01

    Well, at least Jessica will be able to grow into some nice hand-me-downs from JLH….

  15. avatar
    Paleomiz 01/28/2009 08:01

    “A week after the inauguration and with such a feeling of hope in the air for our country”

    Give her credit–she knows there is new president

  16. avatar
    happy 01/28/2009 08:02

    Size 2 is a code. It means enough fabric for 2 pieces/regular size humans.

  17. avatar
    The_Greek_God_Testiclees 01/28/2009 08:02

    She is pretending to have a break down and career change…. her beard is starting to come in..

  18. avatar
    The_Greek_God_Testiclees 01/28/2009 08:02

    Damn you pool.

  19. avatar
    WhoDeaux 01/28/2009 08:03

    Guffaw!

  20. avatar
    SuperB 01/28/2009 08:03

    (—- the face that goes with the ass…

    YAYA…

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