Jessica Simpson is easily perplexed

By brendon June 30, 2011 @ 9:21 AM


Splash News says that Jessica Simpson was having dinner in Santa Monica on Tuesday night, and when she was done she left in an Escalade limousine. Which would be fine if that limousine was for her. Eventually her fiance followed her to a red light and she got into the right car.

This may be a simple misunderstanding or change of plans, but keep in mind that Jessica has done this several other times before. She’ll just climb into any shiny black car. So if you’d like to kidnap Jessica Simpson and get away with it, that’s how your plan should start.

(7) Comments

  1. avatar
    NautiusMaximus08 06/30/2011 14:33

    “OOOOH, a big shiny car. It must be for me!”
    What a pretentious bitch.

  2. avatar
    Shitcock 06/30/2011 14:36

    As with that Lindsay whore, I would very much like to jizz on her jugs.

  3. avatar
    NautiusMaximus08 06/30/2011 14:47

    is that all?

  4. avatar
    Habitual Line Stepper 06/30/2011 15:05

    Two Words: Tit Fuck

  5. avatar
    iSlomoshun 06/30/2011 15:12

    I could swim in those tits for hours.

  6. avatar
    nunyobidnez 07/01/2011 11:32

    she has magnificent boobs

  7. avatar
    Observer 07/06/2011 10:01

    Habitual Line Stepper……@15:05……..

    ….those are two mighty fine words……..

    ….and my thoughts exactly……

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