Adele Is Doing The Theme Song For The New James Bond

By Steve G. March 04, 2013 @ 10:49 AM

“According to Britain’s “The Sun” newspaper, producers want the singer to work on music for the films the way Shirley Bassey did, who sang various songs for Bond movies, including “Diamonds Are Forever”, “Mooraker” and “Goldfinger.”

Adele drives me wild for some reason. They say when you’re going after a big girl you should focus on one thing you like about them, but to be honest I can’t quite put my finger on what it is. I don’t know if it’s the way she waddles around the red carpet like a sexy English emperor penguin or that she looks like bag of meat every time she stuffs herself into one of those award dresses. It could be that she doesn’t take shit from anyone or that she is actually talented as hell and made a pretty solid theme song for Skyfall. I could listen to her get winded on stage all day singing that song. Whatever it is, don’t stop doing it because it’s working for me. Everyone else may be at the party trying to get with the pretty girl but I know the ultimate prize is the beefy loud mouthed British chick sitting in the corner who can’t stop singing about her ex-boyfriend.

(9) Comments

  1. avatar
    Doo Doo Fresh 03/04/2013 11:12

    I feel like I should be wearing a hard hat every time I decide to visit this web page. I need something to protect my cranium from all the falling debris as this place continues to crumble like a condemned crack house in Detroit.

  2. avatar
    AdrianMoss 03/04/2013 11:26

    I would rather stick my dick in a blender than fuck Adele. The only skill in the rack that might make her attractive is me deep throating her while she tries to sing ‘Rolling in the Deep’.

  3. avatar
    RangerLG 03/04/2013 11:35

    “Mooraker”? That seems fitting for this post. Also, what are the odds that Oscar was put in places it would rather not discuss?

  4. avatar
    LoK 03/04/2013 11:46

    Maybe you should call OSHA

  5. avatar
    Squabbler 03/04/2013 12:00

    I think Adele is the perfect choice to do the theme song for a movie called “Mooraker.”

    /Edit, much?

  6. avatar
    LoK 03/04/2013 12:05

    Adrian, I don’t think its you who wants to do the deep throating

  7. avatar
    mr_manzur 03/04/2013 12:09

    Hi, new editor. DO NOT DARE TO TL;DR ME. This concerns all of us.

    I’ve been following the site since 2007 and this is the first hate post I write to any blog, quoting Taylor Swift, “like, ever”. I think the fact that you used a quote from The Sun without mocking the shit out of it makes it necessary. That and the fact that, as you can see with the hordes of hate comments, the site has gone full retard. Even skimming trough the posts is painful. And I know you know it. I know because you shamefully hide your name from the article as if it would embarrass you in future job interviews. And you know what? It totally should.

    Brendon’s fuck up is a subject for another time, but I agree with you in the fact that it happened: He went lazy, predictable and in the past few years kinda’ diluted WWTDD’s essence into what became a disgusting, watered down, old, weak version of what it used to be. But at least it resembled the site in a tiny way. Now that essence is gone, what made this site is gone and whatever pitiful attempts at replicating it you are making suck prolapsed ass.

    WAKE THE FUCK UP. Hire someone worth reading, with a new style (Brendon is gone, deal with it. The right way), do a little redesign, trim your bushes, ‘fuck should I know, I ain’t no media expert. Just a voice among the thousands, now tenths, of readers of this site. We are kind enough to give you a second (third? fourth?) chance, be kind enough to not to feed us chunks of bloating shit like The Sun, Perez Hilton and 6/10 titties.

    Greetings from Mexico, sorry about grammar and stuff.

  8. avatar
    Pugiron 03/04/2013 14:05

    Fat, ugly and her singing is way way overrated. Someone turn this cow into hamburger so she will be at least useful for something.

  9. avatar
    sexpanther 03/05/2013 00:36

    Well said mr_manzur, well said!!

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