A Prince Once Paid 500k To Sample Kristen Stewart’s Sour Puss

Fat Hollywood mogul Harvey Weinstein told the NY Times about the time he convinced Kristen Stewart to hang out with a middle-eastern prince for $500,000. It seems that an unnamed royal from one of those despotic kingdoms where we get our oil REALLY likes Twilight. I guess if you have that much money and have the power to have someone executed nobody makes fun of you for having the same taste as a teen girl on her first period. The prince approached Weinstein to arrange the date in which he would pay half a million dollars, upfront, in cash, for 15 minutes of Kristen Stewart’s precious fucking time.

What I don’t understand is why anyone would want to spend anytime at all with her. She seems like an utterly vile human with a constant scowl and a shitty attitude. Of all the celebs you could spend money to meet, why her? I don’t fucking get it. To me that was always the most unbelievable part of the whole Twilight thing. Why would two gay supernatural boys fight over that scrunchy-faced gila monster? Maybe the prince felt the same untamed lust Stewart’s director on Snow White felt before he went down on her muff and destroyed his marriage. Could Stewart’s vagina be so fucking magnetic that men are ruining themselves personally and financially just to have a taste? If you’ve got an extra $500K sitting around, maybe you can help us find out.