The Nigerians Are Hunting Down Gays Again

By Lex January 15, 2014 @ 2:19 PM

While you were sleeping, Africa went from being a progressive, modern, intellectually curious continent to a place riddled with illness, starvation, and stone-aged thinking. I guess no more TED conferences in Mali for the time being. Anywhere you find large swaths of poverty and illiteracy, you can be sure to find a decent religious fundamentalism taking shape. In Africa, it’s Islamists, pitching that catchy tune that life may be filled with horrific disease and shit in the streets and eating old roof shingles to survive until tomorrow, but if you kill enough Sodomites, Allah’s got something nice cooked up for you in the next world. So, the half of Nigeria that isn’t working on email scams, is rounding up suspected gay men, beating and torturing them for names of their gay compadres so they all can be sent to prison, where obviously there’s no such thing as gay sex. Anybody actually convicted of buggery faces a dozen years in the clink, albeit Nigeria is one of those shithole countries where it’s hard to tell if you’re living in prison or just living in Nigeria. Some gay and civil rights groups have jumped on this brutal roundup in Nigeria, but most remain busy here at home focused on the truly sinister Duck Commander.

wwtdd

(12) Comments

  1. avatar
    LoK 01/15/2014 14:59

    Will you please stop with your butthurt campaign against the Duck Dynasty guy…I mean Jesus Christ you’re worse than TMZ

  2. avatar
    LoK 01/15/2014 15:02

    Know your audience..most of us that come here don’t give a wet fart about all this stupid shit. We want to be entertained and your bitching isn’t doing it…leave the “News” to the “news outlets”.

  3. avatar
    Raymond K. Hessel 01/15/2014 15:04

    Real news doesn’t come from “news” outlets anymore.

  4. avatar
    Raymond K. Hessel 01/15/2014 15:09

    I do admit that for all the years I’ve been coming here, this hasn’t been the typical humor for the site. But you can rest assured that none of the “news” outlets will be reporting on a story like this. If not for WWTDD, I would not have started reading up on other actual news outlets about this news.
    And on top of this, this post does have some actual humor in it.
    “…Africa went from being a progressive, modern, intellectually curious continent…”
    I almost ripped stitches on that early punch line.

  5. avatar
    Vinny Nutsak 01/15/2014 15:28

    Is that Tracy Morgan?

  6. avatar
    GHUA 01/15/2014 15:31

    Homophobia in Africa is just like civil war in Africa. I know it exists, I just don’t care.

  7. avatar
    DrainBammage 01/15/2014 16:13

    @raymond: we the da gay news from all around the world showed down our throats like James Deen’s c0ck, why would they not show this one?

    Im here for the t-i-t-s, if I want the latest fudgepacking news I have Perez and about 3billion other blogs.

    Speaking of d1cks, there is a new trailer for Games of Thrones. (those peens dont bother because they are accompanied with mucho female tasteful nudity)

  8. avatar
    DrainBammage 01/15/2014 16:14

    Wow, big typos… its supposed to be ‘we get’ and ‘shoved down our throats’, not showed.

  9. avatar
    TitsAreNice 01/15/2014 16:49

    Thank goodness Lex doesn’t live in Nigeria, since he apparently loves getting fat black dićks shoved down his throat.

    And misusing commas, of course.

  10. avatar
    Milto 01/15/2014 19:48

    The second dude from the left looks like Chuck D from Public Enemy. And they all look mad. At homos.

  11. avatar
    sammerz 01/16/2014 11:31

    Bring out the brigade of D bags to complain about an article…

  12. avatar
    Maybe_Observer 01/16/2014 14:23

    While you were sleeping, Africa went from being a progressive, modern, intellectually curious continent to a place riddled with illness, starvation, and stone-aged thinking. I guess no more TED conferences in Mali for the time being.

    …….albeit Nigeria is one of those shithole countries where it’s hard to tell if you’re living in prison or just living in Nigeria.

    In my opinion….that is some decent sarcastic funny…..

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