Amy Winehouse’s Ghost Is Going On Tour

Amy Winehouse is going on tour sometime next year. No, they aren’t reanimating her desiccated carcass, even though she’s probably pickled for long term storage. Her father is looking to squeeze out a few more dollars from his deceased child by touring a hologram of the late singer. It’s the same technology they used to project a dead Tupac at Coachella last year when all the white hipster kids went crazy thinking about how they would’ve loved to tell everybody what a genius Tupac was had they lived fifteen years earlier. This technology is only in the begining phases of development. You’ll probably be seeing more of this kind of morbid cynical moneymaking shit in the future. Within ten years you’ll be able to pay get backstage with hologram Amy for what feels like a blowjob from a girl with Smirnoff breath. So start saving now. Fifty bucks isn’t just something you come up with at the last second.