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September 19, 2016 | WTF | Lex Jurgen | 0 Comments
If you look closely at the credentials of those writing parenting advice for outlets like The Washington Post, Yahoo!, and Huffington Post, they start and finish with, I’ve got kids and time on my hands.
Jody Allard didn’t want to blame her sixteen and eighteen year old high school sons in a Washington Post essay for the pervasive rape culture ravaging America, but she had no choice. They’re boys. Ipso facto. Her repeated detailing of her own sexual assault history to them hasn’t seemed to get them activated to prevent typical male high school behavior. Like receiving enthusiastic consent prior to sexual contact with the opposite sex. It’s unclear what enthusiastic consent means, but it seems certain no sober high school girl has ever given it. I’ve thought this over, Brandon, weighed all the pros and cons, considered my legal and moral rights as a young woman, and I would appreciate if you would now fuck me underneath the bleachers. Enthusiastically!
Single-mom Allard laments that her high school boys don’t stand vociferously against the aggressive and demeaning male behavior of their teen peers. Like, maybe handing out pamphlets or organizing assemblies on appropriate norms of male behavior as not defined by males. In the very least, provide the varsity defensive line with mobile apps to receive signature approval from cheerleaders before touching under their sweaters. Because high school isn’t hard enough.
Guilt by association seems like a heavy burden to put upon your boys. Simply because there’s no way to disassociate. Just ask the “moderate Muslims” how they feel every time a bomb blows. An even heavier burden would be exploiting your own children in your personal parenting essays. You don’t see it this way because you’ve created an approval circle of like-minded re-Tweeters by which to measure your legitimacy. The same way in which the Kardashians feel like they’re really helping people. Love and light. Buy my lipstick. Besties forever.
Allard, maybe you’re not simply foisting your past victimization and present political ardency upon your children, but you’re coming really close. Join another group, organize another march, jump to conclusions on pending campus sexual assault cases with no evidence in, all the rape culture standards. Maybe stop raping your kids in the papers. Did they enthusiastically consent to be involved? You’re missing the irony entirely out of convenience.
Photo credit: Jody Allard on Facebook/Twitter