Kill All Clowns

The copycat mayhem of men dressing up as clowns to live out Internet memes in real life has come to its natural conclusion. That is creepy pedophiles and dregs of society with broken frontal lobes playing out their Purge night fantasies in circus clown costume. A few guys playing pranks in the woods of the Carolinas is now Pennywise trying to snatch babies in California in broad daylight.

A woman in Concord, California was approached by a man in a clown suit while waiting at the bus stop midday with her infant daughter. First red flag. Clown in a public setting. After the clown tried to yank her baby away, the woman kicked the clown in the knees and he ran off to the sound of horns and fart shoes.

Since it’s impossible to distinguish between your typical down on his luck children’s party clown and a John Wayne Gacy 2.0, kill the shit out of any adult who walks toward you in clown makeup. Anywhere you are constitutes your ground for standing your ground against clowns. The best defense is a good offense. Hunt down some clowns and kill them while their face paint remains moist. Throw in men with ironic fedoras and bandwagon sports fans if you’ve got extra ammo. For you, your family, for America. No jury will convict you. And a whole lot less people will be wearing clown outfits by morrow. 

Does society risk becoming more dangerous when vigilantes hunt down miscreants based solely on their looks? Dunno. Worth a shot.

_{Photo credit: 11Alive.com}