I THINK I’M IN LOVE

Between yesterday and today, I'm starting to get the suspicion that porn movies lied to me about the secret life of lesbians.  Where are the co-eds who can't afford to repair their car?  Where are the cheerleaders helping their team celebrate the big win?  Where are the co-ed cheerleaders who can't afford to repair their car after the big win?  I was led to believe lesbians led secret lives of sexy passion, where looks of desire turned to an exotic journey of the flesh.  Not … this.  They say lesbian parents are no more likely to raise gay kids than traditional parents, but if all these boys know about vagina is that it looks like Melissa Etherdige and her (kill me) lover, that kid is full blown gay.  Like how when kids get bit by a dog as a baby and then they hate dogs all their life.  This is like that, except that I'd rather have my dick in the mean bitey dog.  On the plus side, it seems Etheridge is a fan of Ohio State, while her girlfriend follows Michigan, so just imagine all the amazing conversation that must be had about that.