By Jack December 06, 2013 @ 2:45 PM
Amanda Bynes is out of psych rehab and wants to pursue a career in fashion. The star of several crappy kid’s movies that paid her parents rent was just released from the mental funhouse where she was receiving treatment for being baby eating cray cray. Reports state that she has enrolled in Fashion Institute of Design & Merchandising in Orange County. Her mom’s lawyer stated that Amanda planned to go back to school to learn fashion shit.
She’s now looking at various colleges with the intention of majoring in fashion design. She’s mentioned before she’s interested in creating a clothing line.”
Umm, would you wear an Amanda Bynes designed outfit? Fashionistas are all secretly fucked up annoying people, but Amanda’s oddity is a bit more public. Oh, yes, I’m wearing a gown designed by that chick who lit her dog on fire in some old lady’s driveway and I feel fabulous. Thank you for asking, fat Kelly Osbourne.
Photo Credit: AKM-GSI, FameFlynet, PCN
By Travis December 05, 2013 @ 10:00 AM
After dominating the news cycle with her seemingly psychopathic tendencies earlier this year, Amanda Bynes has left her rehab facility in Malibu and is moving in with her parents in Los Angeles. The good news for her parents, according to People, is that while they “reestablish the loving relationship” they once had, they get to control all of her money. The bad news is that the number of fires that will be set in their driveway and animals’ lives that will be at risk has jumped 1,000%. In the meantime, the statement from the family’s attorney claims that she is now looking into attending college for fashion design, because there must be millions of women out there who can’t wait to line up at their local Sears to get their hands on “Batshit by Amanda Bynes.”
Photo Credit: WENN.com
By Lex November 21, 2013 @ 6:29 PM
Congratulations, Amanda Bynes. You’re now competent to stand trial for DUI. It’s like graduation day for celebrities. If you can remember a time before Amanda started shaving her head and lighting fires in old lady’s driveways, she was motoring drunk around L.A. in her Beemer and sideswiping cars and running from the police, you know, allegedly. Amanda faces the likely plea deal of a fine and community service teaching inner-city kids how to properly clean their water pipes to avoid nasty bong water face. Even at that, Amanda’s community service is likely to be suspended since she’s only been determined to be not super fucking nuts, but remains legally classified as mostly still totally bonkers.
By Travis September 30, 2013 @ 11:00 AM
The main reason that we haven’t heard anything new about this year’s leading contender for the Biggest Batshit Celebrity Award, Amanda Bynes, is that she had been receiving psychiatric treatment at the UCLA Medical Center. But according to TMZ, that’s over now because she may have left UCLA in favor of The Canyon rehab facility, which is best known for being the place that celebrities go to when they want to pretend like they’re kicking their addictions but don’t want to give up 5-star comfort. TMZ also claims that Amanda “is not wearing her wig and is ‘paranoid’ the paparazzi will find her,” and I’m sure the best solution to that is simply telling everyone where she is.
(Photo Credit: Getty)
By Lex August 12, 2013 @ 3:29 PM
That’s just what old people do in L.A. and N.Y. You file for conservatorship over your mentally troubled showbiz daughter, then you grab mom and head to see Blue Jasmine for a matinee at the local seniors-filled indie theater chain. However, all is not rosy for Amanda’s parents, because apparently the conservatorship they received doesn’t allow them to access any of Amanda’s money. So, they all had to split a box Junior Mints at the movies.
For her part, Amanda is said to be doing better in treatment. Meaning, her restraints have prevented her from lighting any more dogs on fire or calling other celebrities ugly. Doctors claim Amanda is suffering from PTSD related to her childhood stardom. I’d normally ridicule that but it’s probably actually true. Kid stars get fucked up big time. The best thing to do is hand over the management of their adult lives to the people who put them through that in the first place.
By Jack August 09, 2013 @ 12:00 PM
Amanda Bynes’ doctors have asked for an emergency conservatorship from the judge so they can keep her at the madhouse. There was supposed to be a hearing today to see if her parents could get temporary conservatorship of the former child star turned national self-mumbling street roamer. The doctors said that she isn’t well enough to go to the hearing and that the judge has to go to the funny farm himself to decide what to do. How fucking crazy must you be that you are too insane to go to court to see if you are so crazy that your parents have to take care of you? That’s like some straight jacket in a padded cell kind of shit. Doctors can only request this option if the individual is “gravely disabled as a result of a mental disorder.” It’s one thing when we call her fucking nuts, it’s another thing when guys who actually went to school to study mental health label her fucking nuts. Amanda has gone over to the other side. We’ll just have to imagine what kind of crazy ass getup she would have worn to court. That’s a missed opportunity.