Tim Tebow Wants Hot Women To Wait For It

July 18, 2018 | Photos | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

Does anyone know if Tim Tebow has been deflowered yet? Because he sure gets around for a virgin waiting until marriage. He’s dating 2017’s Miss Universe Demi-Leigh Nel-Peters. Maybe mouth and butt stuff doesn’t count. Three Hail Marys after... READ MORE

Paris Hilton Had No Help Making Herself A Millionaire

July 18, 2018 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

Success is relative, and so is sanity when it comes to celebrities. Paris Hilton is pretty insane to honestly believe that she’s “self-made” and somehow started the Hilton empire by herself. Sure she may have invented what the world... READ MORE

Sacha Baron Cohen Giving Guns To Kindergarteners For The LOLs

July 17, 2018 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

Sacha Baron Cohen is coming in hot. He left the nation a little triggered after doing a skit that suggested schoolchildren having access to triggers is the best way to stop a school shooting. The premiere episode of Sacha’s... READ MORE

Whitewashing Fear Has Director Racing To Make Thai Rescue Movies

July 17, 2018 | News | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

Sometimes fear will make you do crazy things. Like beat a dead horse because you’re afraid white people will get to beat it first. The “stuck in danger, please rescue me” movies have been done to death but director... READ MORE

Elon Musk Promising To Purify Water In Flint

July 16, 2018 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

Elon Musk is further proving that poor people make for great test subjects. Following in the footsteps of another wealthy white man by the name of Bill Gates, Elon Musk also wants to make water great again for the... READ MORE

Handmaid’s Product Pulled After Association With Evil Patriarchy

July 16, 2018 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

God bless America, because there’s never a shortage of things to complain about in this country. Handmaid’s Tale is a series designed to reenforce the idea that men are women’s natural oppressors. Any woman that has ever accused a... READ MORE

Anthony Bourdain May Become A Winner After Losing Life

July 16, 2018 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

If you needed anymore proof that all award shows are just for show, look no further than Anthony Bourdain’s multiple posthumous Emmy nominations. Netflix was just about to pull his Parts Unknown show, but pulling a guy’s TV show... READ MORE

Amber Tamblyn Saving One Degenerate At A Time

July 15, 2018 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

Sometimes the elite will credit themselves with almost anything that they can attach their name to that the public will have a hard time proving or disproving. Do you know who saved America from entering World War 3? Dennis... READ MORE

Sasha Baron Cohen Used Sarah Palin As Pawn For His Show

July 14, 2018 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

Bruno was the first film I walked out of. Sacha Baron Cohen had Borat under his belt and since I was going through a raunchy comedy phase, going to see another film by “that guy from the Borat movie”... READ MORE

Two Memorable Musicians Split

July 13, 2018 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

I personally hate talentless couples like Halsey and G-Eazy. Even when combined it’s hard to convince anyone to care about their careers. G-Eazy’s music is about as entertaining as the idea of smelling what’s under Chrissy Metz cleavage after... READ MORE