Joanna Krupa in A Bikini (VIDEO)

Most problems in life can be solved simply by being beautiful and having stellar tits. Joanna Krupa's reputation suffered dearly with past accusations of hooking and having a pussy that smells like StarKist left out for the tabby. The lesser woman might be felled by such... read more

Lindsey Pelas Climbing

The line of succession of blond women with enormous bikini jugs in Hollywood is starting to settle. The behind the scenes Tudor era realpolitik largely unseen by the general audience content to splash one out to the winner. Kate Upton's departure from the big jugs and big... read more

Alexis Ren Next Gen Instagram Pimping

Social media stardom is no longer a novelty. It's a business. Get in early. Alexis Ren started with bikini photos at fifteen. One of her barely covered mid-teen photos went viral and everybody politely pretended it wasn't millions of men around the world jail-baiting one... read more

Kaili Thorne in A Bikini

It's not that pouring water on your tits is ever a bad idea, but there is the potential for a look of desperation. Bella Thorne's two older sisters continue to play the role of Vince and Dom Dimaggio. You might be decent ball players, but you don't get a cool nickname and... read more

Melissa Lori Tinier Bikini

Self-described "heavily published model" Melissa Lori continues her experiment of laying in a thong on Miami Beach to see what opportunity comes knocking. The food trucks are decent and at some point an ocean-soaked man with decent prospects may come up the beach out of... read more

Photoshopped Bikini Gwyneth Paltrow Admits She Used to Be an Asshole

Gwyneth Paltrow conducted an interview and obviously manufactured bikini photoshoot with Samantha Bee for Harper's Bazaar where Paltrow comes clean on everything that means nothing and run through a perfection blender available for sale on Goop. read more

Joy Corrigan in A Bikini

The next time you smugly declare the life of a bikini model to be all sunshine and party drugs, remember the part about not eating. Most people get grumpy after half a day without a meal. Only the very religious skip food for an entire day and God only commands it every... read more

Whitney Port Cancun Bikini

It took me a while to remember who this chick was. The Jewish girl they let me on The Hills to avoid federal lawsuit. read more

Sara Jean Underwood Post-Feminism

After a long hard day there's no better way to relax than with a long slow pull of female objectification. It's like drinking, but you can drive yourself home safely even after an hour of pounding. read more

Kerrie McMahon Topless Plan Isn't Working Peachy

Kerrie McMahon is that Irish born model who came to the U.S. and immediately complained about how aggressive the men are. Including guys who are now stalking her. If her plan was to counter horny loons with tons of barely covered titty modeling shots, it's not working. read more

Joe Simpson Alley Catting

Since leaving his leather pants ministry-ship and heterosexual marriage, Joe Simpson has spent the better part of his days hanging by pools and pretending to be a talent manager. It's unclear who he manages outside of one young model, Jonathan Keith, with whom he travels... read more

The Serena Williams Hottie Mythology Continues Unabated

The basis of the argument that Serena Williams is a crazy attractive woman seems flimsy. It's often related to her professional accomplishments, her female tennis domination, or her commercial acumen. read more