BRUCE WILLIS IS TAPPIN THIS, PART 2

By brendon August 10, 2007 @ 3:00 PM

These are some of the same pictures from yesterday but a few more, and all in better quality, so now you see Bruce Willis drown much more clearly.  After hanging out with playmates on his yacht off the coast of Italy, Bruce probably raced his cigarette boat onto shore, then jumped on the beach where a butler was waiting with keys to a Ferrari on a silver tray.  Then Bruce unbuttoned his dinner jacket and climbed into the sports car with the models, disappearing into the night for an evening of passion and intrigue.  

BRUCE WILLIS IS TAPPIN THIS

By brendon August 09, 2007 @ 4:01 PM

Bruce Willis was photographed with a "mystery woman" earlier this week on a yacht in Sardinia, and apparently it was Karen McDougal, the 1998 Playboy Playmate of the Year.  Page Six says, "the 36-year-old brunette is definitely his girlfriend".  I tried adding up all the hot kitty Bruce Willis has punched over the years but I had to stop because my computer started to smoke.  On a related note, I would bang this chick until sparks came out of her vagina and then sleep the sleep of the pure at heart.  The End.

DIE HARD 4 CLIP IS ONLINE

By brendon June 26, 2007 @ 9:08 AM

Live Free Or Die Hard – F-35The best video clips are here
The internet is a magical world of possibilities where all your dreams can come true, especially if your dream is to see an extended clip from Die Hard 4. 

BRUCE WILLIS GOT BEAT UP BY A GIRL

By brendon June 12, 2007 @ 11:16 AM

Bruce Willis made the first "Die Hard" movie when he was 32.  Now hes 52, and says that filming the action for "Die Hard 4.0" was incredibly hard.  Hell, he even gets his ass kicked by a girl, played by the super hot Maggie Q.  Willis says:

"It was a really hard film to make.  A year ago when we started making this film, the risk factor was very high. There was a high possibility of failure in a film like this. But it turned out very well."  Audiences can also see Willis get beat up by a woman.  "This is the first time I've fought against a woman in a film and lost," Willis said.

Willis gets a pass on this because Maqqie Q is insanely good looking.  She could hold a box cutter to my throat and I'd just start masturbating. That actually might be a pretty good approach.  I have to assume it would be unnerving to my opponent during a fight if I had an orgasm at some point. 

BRUCE WILLIS IS COOL

By brendon May 16, 2007 @ 6:02 PM

Making his case once again for having The Greatest Life In The World, Bruce Willis is now said to be dating super hot Playmate Tamara Witmer.  The New York Daily News says:

The 52-year-old actor is now trying out Playmate Tamara Witmer, who at 23 is five years older than his daughter Rumer.  Witmer, for one, isn't bothered by the age difference. "People expect that," she says. She admits being "a little nervous" when she recently met the "Die Hard" star at L.A.'s Peninsula Hotel.  That was after they got to know each other over the phone. "He's got the sexiest voice!" she says. "He's so smooth and suave. I don't mind the bald head. He's really good looking in person."

Some may have a problem with Bruce dating a girl who isn't even half his age.  And if you're a guy and you don't think this is a good idea, I don't know how to break this to you, but you're gay now. Sorry man, tough break.  You're gay and you kiss guys and you dance around with guys and you hug them and you wear hoop earrings.  Either that or you've been dead for several hours.  Of those, I'd rather be gay.  Gay people have it made in this country.   No kids, your own parades, pink Superman muscle shirts.  Now that's the good life!

(WARNING – these Tamara pics are all really really naked.  So, by "WARNING", I mean "YOURE WELCOME")



THE DIE HARD 4 TRAILER IS HERE

By brendon April 04, 2007 @ 12:30 PM

This trailer swings from dumb to cool and back again about every two seconds. It has Timothy Olyphant from "Deadwood" and Maggie Q from my wish book, so that's cool, but it doesn’t have a bikini car wash, so that kind of sucks. And you can look all you want, but Ben Affleck just isn't there, my friends. Sorry. But it does have a special guest appearance by the FA-22 Raptor, and since the awesome killing power of the American military gives me a hard on, this movie goes right back to being fantastic. The Raptor and I agree: you enemies of freedom better watch your ass.

HUMILIATING UPDATE – okay, so that plane is probably the F-35 Lightining, which looks very much like the FA-22 Raptor.  I probably should have made sure, but I thought only chicks read this page.  And with 20 minute conversations about fighter planes, it's easy to see why.