The Enquirer says today that friends and family of Jessica Simpson are worried she may be headed for a mental breakdown. They say Jess suffered a “frightening collapse recently”. To illustrate all this, they use a picture of her from August 6th. This one, specifically. These mental breakdowns can take a while to kick in sometimes.
“Jessica is in the grips of a life crisis right now,” divulged a family friend. “…in private she is an emotional mess.”
The past year has brought one heartbreak after another. Last winter the singer was mercilessly ridiculed for an expanding waistline and fashion missteps. In July, Tony Romo dumped her on the eve of her 29th birthday - and in September, Jessica’s beloved dog Daisy was snatched by a coyote.
“Jess had hoped she would have a husband, baby and flourishing acting career by the time she turned 30,” said the friend.
“Instead, she feels like her best days are behind her.”
I don’t like the sound of that last part, especially combined with the looks of her Halloween costume. She’s gonna get one of those stupid short haircuts I just know it. God that’s gonna suck. With short hair, she’s gonna look just like a friend of mine. His name is Tom. He’s a mechanic.
(image source = inf daily)
I thought we were finally done with Halloween pictures, but then these showed up, and you don’t discover Katie Price Halloween pictures and not post them. That’s not my rule, it’s in the Bible.
Some people criticize her because her breasts aren’t real. She has implants. But I’m not from outer space here on Earth to study human biology. I don’t care why they’re big, just as long as they are. Also, they’re real on the outside, and that’s the only part I’m involved with.
(source = mavrix online)
While we’re on the subject of sexy Hollywood Halloween pictures, September Playmate Kimberly Phillips has some from the Playboy party on her facebook (her facebook fan page is here). This is relevant to my interests because she might be the most perfect girl of all time (a few of her Playboy pics here), and there is literally nothing on earth I would rather do than look at pictures of Kimberly Phillips.
If I had cancer, and in one hand you had a pill in the form of a gummy bear that would cure me and also make me immortal and give me the power to fly, and in the other hand you had new naked pictures of Kimberly Philips, I would rip the pictures from your hand and then slap you for wasting my precious time. How Dare You! Give me those pictures and leave me at once!
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JENNIFER LOVE CHEWIT - tortured boys everywhere by twittering just this one picture of her as a Playboy bunny for Halloween (full size UHQ here). Aren’t you surprised she didn’t post more? I know I was surprised. According to sources that are Jennifer Love Hewitt, Jennifer Love Hewitt has lost a ton of weight and now looks amazing, but here all we have is this one picture, a picture reminiscent of when fat girls on myspace try to pull the ol’ fat girl “switch-a-roo”. Why would she do that? It’s quite a mystery. Someone should call the cops. (twitter)
JOSS WHEDON - borrowed an old SNL joke (*) to announce his bid to buy the Terminator franchise, the rights to which will be auctioned off later this month. The company that currently holds the rights to all future Terminator projects - including movies, TV and games - has to sell them because they’re so in debt. You can still make real Terminators though and extract your revenge on girls who laughed at you in high school. (NOTE - “Don’t I know it, heh-heh-heh!”) (deadline hollywood)
KIEFER SUTHERLAND - ran up a $500 bar tab with the cast and crew of ’24’ during a break in shooting last week in San Pedro. Awesome now gets awesomer because they were there between 7am and 1pm. That’s right. They STARTED drinking at 7 in the morning. Kiefer paid for everyone, then left a $200 tip. After that they left so Kiefer could win every single category at the Coolest Guy Ever Awards. (tmz)
CHRISTINA RICCI - was in Miami over the weekend, and I forgot to post these yesterday when they were topical, but I already bought them so, hey look, it’s Christina Ricci in Miami! “She’s no Kimberly Phillips”, as the popular saying goes, but some of these are pretty hot. Her piercing blue eyes are an intoxicating ocean of intrigue, her rippling muscles glisten in the sun and her super short shorts reveal just a hint of her tight little sexy ass. Wait. Wait no sorry. I was seeing my reflection in the monitor. False alarm, everyone. (mavrix and splash and inf)
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Kim Kardashian calls this Princess Jasmine costume part of her “Disney Halloween”, but a better name might be “HOLYFUCKINGSHIT”. Kim used to be kind of average looking. Now she seems to get hotter every day. If I had sex with her while she wore this outfit, I would just chop my dick off and frame it when we were done, because no matter what happened next it would all be down hill from there. I prefer to remember it in it’s prime.
(source = kimkardashian.com)
MEL GIBSON - has a new baby girl. His Russian girlfriend Oksana Grigorieva gave birth Friday afternoon. Luckily she wasn’t born one day later, on Halloween, or else like 15 different prophecies in the Torah would have come true. None of them good. (abc news)
JESSICA SIMPSON - went on Twitter to defend her sister and attack ‘Melrose Place’, who fired Ashlee last week. “catching up on MP. who writes this crap? i have had bad scripts to work with, but this? thank God my sister is amazing and got you some press.” After that she began to rub her breasts and wrote, “wow, I have really sensitive nipples.” No not really but that would have been awesome. (twitter)
THE WIRE - will now be offered as a course at Harvard. Watching the TV show. ‘The Wire’. Will be a course. At Harvard. “I do not hesitate to say that it has done more to enhance our understanding of the challenges of urban life and the problems of urban inequality, more than any other media event or scholarly publication,” sociology professor William J. Wilson said. In a related story, I announced I’ll be teaching a course entitled, “Why The Germans And Chinese Are Now Kicking Our Ass.” It’s not really a “course”, I just email people this story and then add, “WTF!!!”. (ny post)
ANNALYNNE MCCORD - went to Halloween as … bat … girl? Man? Both? Neither? I have no idea. It doesn’t really matter. I don’t wanna give away too many details, but let’s just say someone masturbated to these, if you catch my drift. (wenn)
