Reese Witherspoon Unscripted With Script (VIDEO)

By Matt September 30, 2014 @ 8:55 AM

Reese Witherspoon shot a segment for Vogue in which she answers 73 pre-screened questions in the most irritating, faux on-the-spot cadence you have ever heard. The segment is staged to look natural, fails miserably, and serves the basic purpose of allowing Witherspoon to show off her house which has been carefully set dressed to look like a real estate spread devoid of authenticity or contain human emotions. Deperately attempting to be a cute and bouncy teen on her second marriage in her 30s, she hams it up saying she’d love to dine with all the female U.S. Senators (dream dinner!), her rap name would be “Little Spoon”, and some other trite pre written schlock. The series is part of the new Vogue Channel, which you can subscribe to if you ever want to feel the overwhelming urge to kidney punch actresses you previously thought were cool. If you ever thought Witherspoon suffers occasional moments of self doubt, think again. If you still aren’t sure she will spit shine her Oscar and rub it in your face, which she does fruitfully and without irony in this very poor publicity choice which will likely see her PR rep fired immediately.

If you want to see Reese Witherspoon unscripted, I’d recommend this little bit of vérité, which is French for being wasted and swearing:

Reese Witherspoon Is Still The Life Of The Party (VIDEO)

By Travis May 09, 2014 @ 10:00 AM

In a much more entertaining and worthwhile video from Monday’s Met Gala, Cara Delevingne ended up in an elevator with Reese Witherspoon, Zooey Deschanel and Kate Upton, and it seems that at least Reese decided to get a little loose with the booze. Cara coaxed the already infamous drunk into playing the name game with her, because the way Reese says her last name with that twangy southern voice is a real hoot to a British gal like her. But Reese could barely pronounce any word, let alone “Delevingne” or “Do you know who I am?”, because she was apparently too busy making sure she really got her money’s worth of liquid stupidity for the evening.

Reese Witherspoon In Green Shorts Out For A Jog In Brentwood

By Lex April 14, 2014 @ 10:02 AM

Reese Witherspoon In Green Shorts Out For A Jog In Brentwood

Photo Credit: FameFlynet, INFphoto.com

Reese Witherspoon In a Swimsuit on Independence Day

By Lex July 05, 2013 @ 11:28 AM

Reese Witherspoon In A Monokini At The Beach In Malibu
The last time we saw Reese Witherspoon, she was drunk-bitching out an Atlanta cop for arresting her husband for DUI. She simply wanted to remind the local constable that Hollywood celebrities get special treatment. But that rube just wouldn’t listen. So Reese got cuffed and booked and for a few hours I got to imagine her being passed around a Fulton County women’s jail. If only life ever matched fantasy.

Photo Credit: AKM-GSI

Do You Know My Name? Yep, It’s Guilty

By Lex May 02, 2013 @ 4:56 PM

Reese Witherspoon pled no contest today in Atlanta to charges of being a completely annoying bitch at the scene of her husband’s crime. We can say ‘crime’ because Jim Toth pled guilty to DUI at the same time. Which is a actual crime, for which he got the dreaded alcohol rehab sentence and a stiff fake warning from the judge. This isn’t your daddy’s Georgia.

Updated: TMZ just put out the dash cam video of the arrest. Meh, Reese is only mildly fucking annoying. But the best is the tail end when her husband tries to distance himself from her getting up in the officer’s face. Fucking Jim.

Reese Witherspoon Was Arrested

By Travis April 22, 2013 @ 9:00 AM

Reese Witherspoon was arrested on Friday morning in Georgia after her husband, James Toth, was pulled over for suspicion of driving while intoxicated, and while it seems strange that someone as squeaky clean as Witherspoon would be arrested when her man was doing all the dirty work, it turns out that she might be a complete bitch.

While the officers were taking care of business with Toth, Witherspoon allegedly got a little high and mighty, leading to her arrest for disorderly conduct. According to the police report, Witherspoon broke out the A+ diva routine.

“Mrs. Witherspoon began to hang out the window and say that she did not believe that I was a real police officer…”

According to the report, she “stated that she was a ‘US citizen’ and that she was allowed to ‘stand on American ground.’”

“Mrs. Witherspoon asked, “Do you know my name?” I answered, “No, I don’t need to know your name.” I then added, “right now.” Mrs. Witherspoon stated, “You’re about to find out who I am.”

“Mrs. Witherspoon also stated, ‘You are going to be on national news.’ I advised Mrs. Witherspoon that was fine.” (Variety)

It’s a shame she wasn’t tazed. That officer would have received a parade.