By Lex November 22, 2013 @ 5:10 PM
Everybody is using Scarlett Johansson’s birthday today as an excuse to show a bunch of pictures of her big ole boobs. I skipped Acai berries and that whole ‘get in shape’ thing during the last decade, I’ll be damned if I’m missing out on this trend. Scarlett’s having a big year. She got engaged to some French dude who runs an urban art magazine (read as: family money) and Esquire named her Sexiest Woman Alive. I’m not sure about all of that, but it’s certainly more on point than Maxim’s Miley Cyrus death knell. That’s it. Check out her tits.
Photo Credit: Getty
By Lex October 07, 2013 @ 12:46 PM
Maxim so lowered the bar with their Miley Cyrus Is the Most Attractive Creature Walking This Planet back alley abortion that I can’t bring myself to ridicule Esquire for their Scarlett Johansson nod. This superlatives whacking contest is just a time honored tradition for selling magazines in the old world economy of print journalism. Call me old fashioned but I go by the old standard of ‘Would you throw this woman out of bed?’. Personally, I’ve got the entire adult female world minus Lena Dunham and the chick who Charlize Theron portrayed in Monster on my list.
Photo Credit: Esquire
By Lex September 04, 2013 @ 2:11 PM
It’s never a good idea to quiz a woman on her previous relationships. A man takes what he can get in this world and ever looks forward. If you start investigating shit from the past, you’re only going to ruin a good thing, or ruin a bad thing, either way, you’re going to be getting laid less. Still, there’s going to be that moment when you’re kissing Scarlett Johansson’s big ole boobs and she blurts out, that’s where Sean Penn used to jizz, and you’re going to kick yourself for not being a little more inquisitive on the front end.
Here’s Scarlett at the Venice Film Festival. Like all European film festivals, it’s a grandiose celebration of films nobody is ever going to pay ten bucks to see.
Photo Credit: FameFlynet, WENN
By Lex June 14, 2013 @ 10:33 AM
It was just a couple years ago that Scarlett Johansson’s attorney was threatening to sue the shit out of everybody and their mother if they shared her nude cellphone pictures. Scarlett was so shaken up, she started having sex with Sean Penn. No woman should ever have to feel that low. Now, Scarlett’s made a return to social media to share her own sexy self picture. Because that’s just how celebrities are. They want attention. They just want it on their own terms. Which is just like every other person in this world if every other person in the world had tons of money and a Century City law firm on retainer.
By Travis May 01, 2013 @ 11:00 AM
Captain America: The Winter Soldier is currently filming in Los Angeles, and these new set photos show Chris Evans picking on a nerdy bald guy while Scarlett Johansson stands behind him, using her super power of looking fantastic with fake red hair and leather pants. Johansson’s Black Widow also joins in on the ass-kicking, but it’s actually her stunt double, in case you were starting to get excited about your chest-kicking fetish.
I don’t know anything about the plot of this sequel, but I’m hoping is has something to do with an evil villain trying to take over the world and the only thing that can stop him is the Black Widow entering a wet t-shirt contest.
(Photo Credits: WENN)
By brendon February 20, 2013 @ 6:43 PM
If this were your local news, I could say, “Is Scarlett Johansson engaged, and is there a connection to Natalie Holloway killer Joran van der Sloot?” And then 20 minutes later I’d say I have no idea about either one of those things but Scarlet was wearing some kind of ring in New York. Local news can honestly go fuck itself.
(images of scarlett and her french journalist boyfriend romain dauriac = inf)