MICHAEL JACKSON IS REALLY SMART

Michael Jackson, who hasn't lived in the United States since his acquittal on sexual molestation charges, has been staying in Ireland lately and is reportedly planning to open an amusement park with a leprechaun-inspired theme.  The Daily Mirror says:

"Michael is deadly serious about this idea.  He loves the whole idea of leprechauns and the magic and myths of Ireland. It would cost around 500 million Euros [about $635 million] to do. He’s always wanted to open his own theme park and he thinks Ireland is the perfect place and it will all be built around the leprechaun theme."

Man, this is gonna make like a billion dollars!  Where can I invest some of my money?  Because people trust Michael Jackson to show their kids a good time and Irish people love it when Americans show up and associate them with leprechauns.  What could go wrong?  Maybe after this he could open a park in Italy where all the dudes play accordions with monkeys on their shoulder and all the women carry roller pins and say "why you breaka you mamas heart!"  Or one in Thailand staffed by white people who pull their eyes back and say "me sucky-sucky, 5 dolla!"  Man, Michaels gonna be rich!  

(the Jessica picture is pointless.  There was a Michael one but it creeped out the whole page.)