BEYONCES GOT THE HEP. MAYBE.

The Los Angeles County Department of Public Health issued a warning yesterday to everyone who attended the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue party on Valentine's Day that they may have been exposed to acute hepatitis A after it was revealed that an employee of Wolfgang Puck Catering was recently diagnosed with the disease.  The health department is warning everyone who attended the party to get an immune globulin shot by today.   The guest list who may have been exposed includes Beyonce Knowles, Leo DiCaprio's girlfriend Bar Rafaeli, Marissa Miller, Joanna Krupa and basically all of the models who appear in the swimsuit issue.  TMZ says:

When contacted, a rep from Puck's catering company would not tell TMZ which other events Puck catered, nor would they reveal how many other people may have been exposed to the illness. They did say, however, that no one who attended Sunday's Governor's Ball at the Academy Awards is at risk.

God, I hope Marisa Miller gets hep, because that's when I make my move.  I may even meet her outside the clinic with a boombox over my head.  She may be finally be damaged enough for me to have a shot.  I've dreamt about sex with her for like 8 years now.  Turning her down because of a little thing like the hep would be like turning down a ride on the Millennium Falcon because they weren't showing a good movie.  I'm not gonna lie to you, the odds of me getting hepatitis are pretty good anyway, so once Marisa and I both have it, well now the fun really begins, my friends.