March 7, 2007 | celebrity | editor | 0 Comments

Kanye West has now officially agreed to perform in Al Gores Live Earth extravaganza concert, a global benefit concert set for July 7 that will be staged on all seven continents.  In a related story about the importance of reducing our reliance on fossil fuels and how committed our famous celebrities are, Kanye West is flying a chef from London to Manhattan to serve him lunch at a business meeting tomorrow.  CNN says:

For a feast of onion bhajees, chapati breads, biryanis, pappadums, a specially prepared fish dish and vegetables on the side, the bill will top $3,900, plus travel and accommodation for the restaurant's head chef … The meal will be prepared, cooled, shrink-wrapped and packed in dry ice in the British Raj's kitchens and — along with head chef Kaysor Ahmed — will be helicoptered from Wales to London's Heathrow Airport on Tuesday.  From there, the chef is to hop a flight to New York — monitoring the food's temperature all the way — clear customs, and head for Manhattan, where the meal is to be served during a meeting Wednesday.

Finally, a type of activism I can get behind.  The kind where you don’t actually have to do anything and make no sacrifices whatsoever.  In fact, you actually make things much worse.  In this spirit, I went by a local bikini car wash being held by some high school cheerleaders and told them all to "fuckin' blow me", because I think it's wrong that they would stoop to such tawdry tricks to raise money. And also because I felt they should blow me.  Then I went back in line and said the same thing again.  On trips 3-7, I even pointed to my penis in case there was some confusion.  Trip number 8 shouldn’t count because I was actually in a Taco Bell drive through and trips number 9, 10, 11, and 12 – 22 were inconclusive because, even though I had my pants off, the bikini cheerleaders pretended to not see my car.  Luckily its being held again tomorrow and by then I should have some more data about reducing our global footprint.

Tags: Kanye West


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