06.29.2007 ZE GERMANS CAVED

Monday, wire reports said that the World War II movie "Valkyrie" would not be allowed to film on German military sites because its star, Tom Cruise, is a scientologist.  Now the German government has reconsidered, deciding that the story of high ranking German officers attempting to assassinate Adolph Hitler was important because it's a rare positive portrayal of Germans during the war.  ABC.com says:

The German ministry now says that, while it hasn't received an official request from "Valkyrie" producers to shoot in the country, it would "look agreeably" upon any such application.
The source of the "Valkyrie" controversy seems to have stemmed from a posting on the Web site of conservative German member of parliament Antje Blumenthal. Blumenthal posted a statement Friday claiming that Defense Minister Franz-Josef Jung had pledged to her that Cruise would not get permission to shoot because of the purported danger posed by his Scientology.
"Valkyrie" is being praised as one of the "too few examples of military opposition to Hitler's regime."
"The assassination attempt against Hitler is hardly known outside Germany," Fisser said. "We should therefore be delighted and welcome this wonderful opportunity to improve the image of our country."

God damit, you already had improved the image of your country by yelling at sceintology.  If you think Tom Cruise playing one of you is gonna help your image, you're screwed.  You might as well get OJ or a talking gun.

(60) Comments

  1. Emmysbf 06/29/2007 11:01

    FIRST?!?!

  2. Pedro! 06/29/2007 11:01

    hooray for scientology!

  3. Pedro! 06/29/2007 11:01

    tie for first BIATCH!

  4. Lightdragon 06/29/2007 11:03

    I agree with what Brend0n said

  5. Jesus H. Christ 06/29/2007 11:03

    Kraut pussies.  Just when you think someone will stand up for their beliefs and say, "we will not allow dwarfs into our culture", they puss out.  Think Jesse Jackson had anything to do with this?  Sure smells like it.

  6. Juan 06/29/2007 11:04

    It would have been better if Tom Cruise was starring in a feature film version of "Hogan's Heroes."

    "Hoooggaaannn!"

    "I know nothing, nothing!"

    I can see Cruise as Hogan, John Goodman as Sgt. Schultz, Jim Carey or Anthony Hopkins as Col. Klink, Isaiah Washington as Kinch, and Hugh Grant as Newkirk.

     

  7. YourUncleClyde 06/29/2007 11:05

    Jesus H Christ what the hell, my respect for the german's is now slightly lower then the respect i have for myself

  8. DB's Treasure 06/29/2007 11:09

    Im ashamed to be German-Irish

  9. Son of Bill Brasky 06/29/2007 11:10

    Perhaps Xenu brain washed them?…

  10. Kitty 06/29/2007 11:11

    that's because you're not German-Scottish

  11. Brave Sir Robin 06/29/2007 11:11

    Maybe they could re-cast Cruise as Hitler…that would be a win-win.

  12. DB's Treasure 06/29/2007 11:14

    I remember reading an article on this site that mentioned how Cruise gathers the whole cast around in a group Scientology prayer. Is it just me, or would any of you rip the hair out of his head and drop kick him in his junk if he ever mentioned a word of his religion to me?

  13. DB's Treasure 06/29/2007 11:14

    …or to you

  14. Shini 06/29/2007 11:15

    They would improve the image of the country (with me anyway) more by telling Tom Cruise and Scientology where to shove this movie. 

  15. sheepsteeth 06/29/2007 11:17

    Having been a member of Scientology for over 5 years now, Im fucking skint, Fuck you Tom Cruise.

  16. Evil Malcom Norris 06/29/2007 11:17

    That is an odd story! Who the heck wants to see a good German? But wait. Good German gets  killed in the end…That sounds very promising…

  17. Sousbois 06/29/2007 11:25

    Typical Hollywood. Just because Tom Cruise is black, and has struggled through his career because of that, he gets treated like a talentless, brainwashed bag of shit.

    When you gonna give Ol' Tom a chance, Hollywood? 

  18. Holodigm 06/29/2007 11:27

    wait, are we saying it's a good thing that germany was going to block this because of his beliefs?  i thought we were supposed to look down on that sort of thing…

  19. WordBearer 06/29/2007 11:32

    What the hell does a Scientology prayer sound like? "We fear the Lord Xenu, but are not afraid. Please do not put us on DC-10s and fly us to a lame planet under a cold indifferent sun."

    Why does anyonefollow this religion? Hubbard was a sci-fi writer and he was bad at that. That being said, I would like to invite everyone to join my Church of Battlestar Galactica.

  20. Dirty Hairy 06/29/2007 11:34

    He's still a horse fucker. I will do my part by not going to see (another one of his) the movie.

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