WHEN RETARDS GO CLUBBING

By brendon July 10, 2007 @ 11:10 AM

The New York Daily News says today that Pete Wentz of Fall Out Boy is as clever as he is handsome!  Pete still claims to be sober even though GF Ashlee Simpson secretly – brace yourself – pours alcohol into water bottles and then gives them to Pete to drink.

…the Fall Out Boy bassist drank only Fuji water during Saturday night's dinner at the Stereo House in Water Mill. "He's never been a huge drinker," said one pal, "but now it's cold turkey." Strange, then, that later as he manned the turntables at the Hpnotiq party at Dune in Southampton, girlfriend Ashlee Simpson decanted Veuve Clicquot into an empty Perrier bottle for him. As Wentz sipped in the deejay booth, a fellow emcee announced, "Look at our man Wentz. He's drinking Perrier; that's all he drinks."

Perrier?  What kind of homo / little girl / retard pretends to drink Perrier and then brags about it.  The article goes on to say that he mushed his croissant when he adjusted his beret, hid some beer in a juice box with a purple dinosaur on the front, and read a Playboy while pretending to study a calculus textbook.



wwtdd

(61) Comments

  1. avatar
    Sloppy Joe 07/10/2007 12:00

    If Ashlee needs to get laid that bad she should try royphnol like i do.

  2. avatar
    Billy 07/10/2007 12:01

    4th !    Oops

  3. avatar
    nobody 07/10/2007 12:01

    She did, but every time she took one she'd fall asleep and wake up hours later with a sore ass.

     

  4. avatar
    bryce 07/10/2007 12:03

    Wow, celebutards are so clever!

    To be fair LiLo invented this move right? Oh, no. I am thinking of every alcoholic in the last 100 years…

    If you are gonna drink and do drugs then that's your business. But man up! Little bitches…

    *Sigh*

  5. avatar
    Cap'n Saveaho 07/10/2007 12:04

    This guy likley takes it in the ass and calls it a high colonic. Only losers quit. Only fags claim to quit but fake it and have there no talent girlfriends enable them.

  6. avatar
    brian16 07/10/2007 12:05

    Ashlee is surgically enhanced and gorgeous.  I'd give anything to ram her cornhole.

  7. avatar
    Joey 07/10/2007 12:05

    brother and sister? what?

  8. avatar
    bryce 07/10/2007 12:06

    And the 'base player from Fallout Boy'? Seriously?

    Is that what girls like these days? She deserves all the tears, STDs, rehab and abortions she gets from that dude.

    Girls are so smart…

  9. avatar
    The Ghost of Deano 07/10/2007 12:08

    who

  10. avatar
    The Ghost of Deano 07/10/2007 12:08

    fucking

  11. avatar
    The Ghost of Deano 07/10/2007 12:08

    cares?

  12. avatar
    Juan 07/10/2007 12:09

    It is a well-known fact that if you put alcoholic beverages in water bottles, it magically becomes non-alcoholic.

    Works the other way round, too.  Try it! 

  13. avatar
    supermanbrandon007 07/10/2007 12:09

    Fallout Who? I cant understand a fucking word they sing!

  14. avatar
    DB's Treasure 07/10/2007 12:10

    "Pete Wentz of Fall Out Boy is as clever as he is handsome!"

    Is that a punch line? 

  15. avatar
    Dirty Hairy 07/10/2007 12:15

    I would totally beat Fall Out Boy in a fight.

    BTW, nice hat bitch.

  16. avatar
    djprimak 07/10/2007 12:16

    Those tricky bastards!

  17. avatar
    DB's Treasure 07/10/2007 12:17

    I have no idea how some of these Emo driven, alternative rock hopping cock suckers get girls! But I'd much rather not have Ashlee Simpson, so I guess he loses all the way around.

  18. avatar
    Slaappy 07/10/2007 12:22

    I'm going to buy some eyeline to be just like this "Super" stud

  19. avatar
    Mr Flannery 07/10/2007 12:23

    I thought he was gay? That's not a joke.

  20. avatar
    Doctress Leisa 07/10/2007 12:23

    Nice eyeliner, you fucking poseur.

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