ONE MILLION DOLLARS?

By brendon April 17, 2008 @ 7:28 AM

Page Six says today that Joe Simpson, dad and manager of Jessica and Ashlee Simpson, is already shopping around pictures of the baby of Ashlee and her fiancé, Pete Wentz, even though it hasn't been officially confirmed that she's even pregnant, and according to that picture above taken Tuesday, any delivery date would seem to be a very long way away.  All that's known for sure is that that was one really long opening sentence.

Joe Simpson is trying to cash in on the baby-crazed trend in celebrity magazines – but he's having a difficult time.
A magazine source said, "Joe is contacting all the weeklies and asking them to pony up $1 million to put Ashlee on the cover.  The deal would include photos of Ashlee – taken by Joe, of course, so he can make more money – an interview and photos of the baby when she has it," our source said.
Sadly, there is some interest – but not for anything close to $1 million.
One magazine editor said the pictures would fetch "$60,000 maybe – but definitely not a million. The timing is a little suspicious. Her album is dropping next week, and there was little to no interest until now. Ashlee's lucky she got pregnant, frankly."
But even with the marriage announcement, "Joe has an unrealistic expectation of what Ashlee can command," the editor said.

Jessica Simpson could be the biggest star in the world but her dimwat dad can't manage to do anything right.  This entire family is retarded.  In fact I heard the Simpson family crest just shows some dude with his shirt on inside out and backwards, sitting at a table in front of a bowl of rocks with a spoon in it.

wwtdd

(57) Comments

  1. yohnskull22 04/17/2008 08:23

    So I guess Rayban Wayferers are officially back even though all of these stupid chicks look even stupider with them on.

  2. Crabbus 04/17/2008 08:25

    ONE MILLION COCKSHITTERS JOIN IN DICKSLAPPIN' UNISON

    SHIT ON HER CHEST, MAN 

  3. yohnskull22 04/17/2008 08:28

    Someone already Shit in her hat.

  4. djtechsys 04/17/2008 08:30

    Brend*n said: "This entire family is retarded."

    If someone said that they were direct relatives of Homer and Marge Simpson, i would not be shocked one bit.

     

    it could happen.

  5. tangocash00001 04/17/2008 08:31

    maybe if she did one interesting thing in her life she might get some more cash.  why doesn't she  drive over to Britney's house and eat out her vagina on the front porch while Pete cries in the background. that should start the meter going in the right direction.

  6. Paparazzi Killer 04/17/2008 08:32

    Well, if Page Six says so, it must be true.

    Eventually, you'll realize nobody gives a shit about this story. 

  7. djtechsys 04/17/2008 08:34

    tangocash00001 – i think she's blocked out Pete's crying. kinda like how we never think about breathing or our heart beating, his boo-hoo'ing has faded into the background.

  8. Doctress Leisa 04/17/2008 08:39

    Can anyone bid on those pictures? In that case, I bid the change under my couch cushions and one used condom.

  9. Mo 04/17/2008 08:48

    Doctress, I see that and raise you my son's piggybank and tooth fairy money.

  10. pat@cegtalent 04/17/2008 08:50

    WOW – I care

  11. Mongoose 04/17/2008 08:53

    You want meerrion dorrah?

  12. Doctress Leisa 04/17/2008 08:53

    Mo, I'll see that and raise you the milk in my fridge that expired 3 weeks ago PLUS whatever I can comb out of my bush.

  13. Hindenberg 04/17/2008 08:55

    I would say Pete Wentz is more retarded than the whole Simpson family. Man I hate that guy.

  14. tangocash00001 04/17/2008 08:57

    jesus doctress

  15. pepper 04/17/2008 08:59

    Joe, how about one million for the baby?

  16. SCBitch 04/17/2008 09:08

    Joe, don't listen to Pepper.

    For $50,000 you can get one from india and bleach it the same way Michael Jackson got bleached.  And then all you'll need is a series of different sized pillows to fill in her belly.  You could make almost $10,000 profit that way!

     

  17. Mo 04/17/2008 09:09

    Damn, Doctress, I bet whatever's in your bush is pretty good, but I ain't shaved my pits yet this winter so I'm gonna add THAT to the pile.

  18. Doctress Leisa 04/17/2008 09:11

    but I ain't shaved my pits yet this winter

    It's the 3rd week in April, Mo–time to shave 'em before you have to braid 'em 

  19. Mo 04/17/2008 09:13

    Braids, add some beads… it's a summer look soon enough.

  20. yohnskull22 04/17/2008 09:15

    The stakes are high and so am I. Got me a rock and Roll band it's a Free for All.  Ooh BaBy.

    YoW!!

    Doctress I'm gonna have to hear Free for all by Nugent tomorrow.  I'd like to dedicate it from the Skull in DC to you in Cali and Mo wherever she is.

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