SCARY WENT TO EGYPT

There's really nothing at all that sounds appealing to me about Egypt.  Let's start with the fact that there's no white people and I'm incredibly racist so that's a problem right there.  I guess the big thing is the pyramids but I'm not a fucking librarian so I don't care about that.  Also, from what I understand, mummies can wake up at any time, without warning, and they're already dead so you can't stop them as they kill anyone who stands in their way of taking back their magic necklace.  Thankfully none of this stopped the very brave Melanie Brown from going down there and showing off her luscious titties.  The bikini top is awesome but that bikini bottom would worry me.  It's like 900 degrees there and it's all dirty and dusty and I don't think they have air conditioning or running water so hopefully she's packing her vagina in salt, like cowboys used to do with meat.  To keep it fresh.

(picture source = bauer griffin)