09.08.2009 afternoon headlines

handsome

HANDSOME MAN ALERT - Alan Dale Lee was arrested in Pasco County, Florida this weekend for stabbing a man in the stomach with a knife. The key to surviving prison is to stay under the radar. Don’t stand out. In other words, goodbye Alan. (splash)

THE HOBBIT - New Line Cinema, who made ‘the Lord of the Rings’ movies, has settled a lawsuit with the estate of JRR Tolkien claiming they were owed over 150M. The suit would have blocked the studio from making two more movies based on Tolkien’s ‘The Hobbit’. I guess the family took the hint when I dressed up as Gandolph and called their house and said, “drop thy legal shields or thou’ist are dead.” And then I waved my wand over the phone and added, “WAAAJAAAA!” (reuters)

HOLLYWOOD - The major studios made rang up 5 billion dollars in tickets sales this summer, with the ‘Transformers’ sequel the top earner at just over 400M.  It’s the most popular thing that sucks since Lindsay Lohan.  (variety)

LINDSAY LOHAN - Speaking of, they call this a “camel-toe alert” but that seems understated. It’s more like she has an invisible hand down her pants. (mirror UK)

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56 Comments

(56) Comments

  1. Death to Finkle! 09/08/2009 16:39

    NIGZ, etc.

  2. TheOverrated 09/08/2009 16:39

    i am that guys dentist, i have him on strict regime of crack and cadbury, before he leave my office i tell him a rock a day keeps the shakes away.
    http://theoverrated.com/

  3. Death to Finkle! 09/08/2009 16:40

    I laughed:

    http://img2.moonbuggy.org/imgstore/daddy-clown-porn.gif

  4. SinDs 09/08/2009 16:43

    well, i’m all hot and bothered now!

  5. DB's Treasure 09/08/2009 16:47

    …I don’t get it, DtF

  6. DB's Treasure 09/08/2009 16:48

    At least we know Alan Dale Lee won’t be sucking any dick in prison, that’s for sure.

  7. pepper 09/08/2009 16:48

    this is more like it…
    http://magamba.com/index~i~17679~im~25.htm

  8. Death to Finkle! 09/08/2009 16:49

    Was it in the Last Boy Scout where John McClain talks about his partner accidentally fucking his wife?

    What did you trip and your dick accidentally land in her? “Oh. I’m sorry, Mrs. H.”

  9. Rokan 09/08/2009 16:49

    Are those his top teeth or his bottom ones?

  10. dirtydiane 09/08/2009 16:49

    jesus…my ovaries just fucking seized up looking at that banner pic.

  11. Death to Finkle! 09/08/2009 16:50

    I was googling “penis” and “kazoo”, DB. Led me to clown porn. Wouldn’t have thought there’d be such a thing.

    I was wrong, apparently.

  12. Big Smelly Dirt Cock 09/08/2009 16:51

    I guess now is as good a time as any to tell everyone, I can turn invisible and that is my hand grabbing her snatch. Don’t tell anyone but it smells like an old, hot shoe.

  13. Observer 09/08/2009 16:53

    1.) What a “Toofus”…..or is it “Doofus”….
    2.) ; ; ;
    3.) ;

    4.)…I’d put my hand down Lindsay’s bikini bottom….

  14. Observer 09/08/2009 16:54

    DTF….

    …my wife swears she fucking a “damn clown” at times….

  15. Watt 09/08/2009 16:54

    BSDC!

  16. Watt 09/08/2009 16:56

    I still have 2 hours left. I need to get the fuck out of here

  17. biggielaing 09/08/2009 16:58

    We don’t need more shitty boring fucking movies about Hobbit’s. I can’t get the 75 hours they wasted already.

  18. SuperB 09/08/2009 17:00

    wow, that is one jacked up grill

    can you imagine what that breath might smell like…

    /dry heave

  19. Watt 09/08/2009 17:01

    Imagine him going down on you B!

  20. DB's Treasure 09/08/2009 17:02

    mmmmm mmmmm MMMMMM!!!!

    http://magamba.com/images/upload/98463863781523834full.jpg

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