Christina Aguilera was sad about her divorce :(

By brendon December 02, 2010 @ 2:49 PM


(NOTE – like most stories, this one is hotter if you imagine it’s about UK model Rhian Sugden and her giant naked breasts. pictures under the cut.)

Christina Aguilera tells People magazine that she was something feelings something something divorce oh my god I’m already bored.

“When you’re unhappy in your marriage, your children are the ones who suffer. That’s the last thing I wanted … Things were so unhealthy and unhappy for both Jordan and me, I knew I had to end it. I really didn’t want to hurt Jordan, and I felt torn about splitting our family up.”

If you didn’t wanna hurt Jordan you shouldn’t have doubled in size, fatty.

Since filing for divorce, Aguilera has been out in Los Angeles and New York City with a new man, Matthew Rutler, a set assistant on Burlesque.
“He’s the kind of person you could spend hours with on the phone talking to and all of a sudden it’s daylight,” she says.

In other words, he’s the kind of person who’s trying to get laid and in order for that to happen, first he has to sit there and listen to all your stupid stories. Women are great, they’re awesome at a lot of things, talking on the phone is not one of them. I’d rather call a fax machine and stay on the phone with that all night than Christina Aguilera.


(17) Comments

  1. SsnakeOil 12/02/2010 14:53

    Wow, that’s some mean shit.

    Thanks, Bren.

  2. SCUM 12/02/2010 14:54

    I like nip. lips, hips, whips, chips and dips.

  3. i hate you 12/02/2010 14:56

    this is the best post we’ve had since that guy being drunk in subway

  4. Thundercunt 12/02/2010 14:58

    “In other words, he’s the kind of person who’s trying to get laid and in order for that to happen, first he has to sit there and listen to all your stupid stories.”

    Nailed it.
    Stupid chicks and their stupid stories… it’s painful every time.

  5. Thundercunt 12/02/2010 15:01

    Those titties are fantastic, however. I applaud them and raise a large card with a 10 on it.

  6. SCUM 12/02/2010 15:02

    Rhian is okay but I like Vikki better.

  7. bemo5584 12/02/2010 15:09

    Best post since the Russian Kate.

  8. minimosh 12/02/2010 15:13

    thanks for the shoe talk dtf. Now I can rest assured that all foot men who see me today will nod in approval at my feets.

    It’s a shame Xtina is so sad. Maybe next time her reflection will show who she really is inside.

  9. i hate you 12/02/2010 15:16

    mini why are you so introspective today? first you said my future girlfriend is a souless creature and blah blah blah…..

  10. Chicagoaniml 12/02/2010 15:35

    Maybe a creampie would cheer her up. Pie always makes me smile.

  11. Tom Foolery 12/02/2010 15:41

    What did I miss, Mini pics? Missed the show guys so yay or nay?

  12. Slaappy 12/02/2010 15:43

    This might cheer her up?

  13. Zombie 12/02/2010 15:46

    I think Mini felt a little threatened by the attention being shown to Pam, so she’s become frustrated and trying to take charge.



    ::waits for blah blah blah retort::

  14. Tom Foolery 12/02/2010 15:48

    Girls do get possessive over guys attention. I could care less

  15. Mac-Daddy 12/02/2010 15:56

    new up!

  16. Watt 12/02/2010 15:57

    I would not jerk it for a month then blow more baby mayo in her cunt than a deli.

    Cmon anchor baby!

  17. Gildorg 12/02/2010 17:48


    Hooray for Boobies!

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