It seems impossible to believe, but Charlie Sheen has now taken four drug tests in four days, and passed all four, including one last night.
(Sheen) tested negative for the presence of marijuana, cocaine, opiates and methamphetamine in a random drug test as Radar observed at his Los Angeles mansion Tuesday night, just a few short hours after authorities dramatically removed his 23-month-old twin sons Max and Bob from the premises, and returned them to (his wife Brooke) Mueller.
Without prompting, Sheen took the random drug test, which we observed. He passed.
When they say “without prompting”, they mean that Sheen had a drug test just sort of lying around and he took it out without being asked and said “hey a drug test” and then he took it and Radar says he passed.
You have to admit that, with controls like this in place, the results would be impossible to fake. But this hardly seems like a victory for Sheen because if he’s not high then he’s insane to a degree where he’s a week away from wearing a diaper and demanding everyone address only the puppet on his hand. Suddenly “drug addict” seems way better.