Drew Barrymore is getting married

After dating for just about a year, Drew Barrymore got engaged to Will Kopelman, who is probably gonna kill her for her money. Because he’s an art consultant, which sounds like a phony job, and he just looks like the kind of guy who would marry someone and then kill them for their money. So don’t be surprised if Drew and her big stupid face have a little “accident” next year. It’s amazing no one thought of this sooner. She’s rich and dumb as a rock even when she’s not high, which is always. Even painting a big X on the floor and then telling her to stand on it under the safe dangling from a rope would work.