Kristen Stewart is way too cool to care about anything

By brendon June 05, 2012 @ 2:42 PM


Kristen Stewart is on the cover of the July issue of Vanity Fair, and go ahead and read the interview if you want. Or don’t, whatever man, she doesn’t even care.

“I have been criticized a lot for not looking perfect in every photograph.”

“But not for exaggerating, because I don’t ever do that.”

“I get some serious shit about it. I’m not embarrassed about it. I’m proud of it.”

“You and your professionalism can suck my dick.”

“If I took perfect pictures all the time, the people standing in the room with me, or on the carpet, would think, What an actress! What a faker!”

So she’s offended if people think she’s a good actress? This explains a lot.

“That thought embarrasses me so much that I look like shit in half my photos, and I don’t give a fuck. What matters to me is that the people in the room leave and say, ‘She was cool. She had a good time. She was honest.’ ”

“We wasted 6 hours and didn’t get a single usable picture but all that really matters is that Kristen had fun fucking everything up,” said No One Ever.

“I don’t care about the voracious, starving shit eaters who want to turn truth into shit.”

So I can call her ugly and she won’t care? Perfect. Because two of pictures of “Kristen” are actually images of my colon. Try to guess which ones.

(16) Comments

  1. avatar
    Honkey Dong 06/05/2012 14:47

    Kristen Stewart may not give a fuck, but does she sell one?

  2. avatar
    Observer 06/05/2012 14:53

    Honkey Dong……..

    …you are an astute analyst….

  3. avatar
    Observer 06/05/2012 15:01

    “Voracious starving shit-eaters….”…..

    ….is that from Shakespeare…??

  4. avatar
    Caribou 06/05/2012 15:21

    Charlize is an absolute weapon though.

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    dubbya 06/05/2012 15:27

    She uses so many swears. What a rebel. She must not give a shit about fuck, bitch. Shit.

  7. avatar
    Gildorg 06/05/2012 15:28

    Gee Obs…

    Some of your Gifs are a little disturbing…

  8. avatar
    Mr. Nutt 06/05/2012 15:37

    I couldn’t post earlier. Can we please have a list of banned words please. Also, please tell us the purpose of a daytime ban when the post is still up during the day from the night before. Thank you.

    Gildorg my friend! How the fuck are you?

  9. avatar
    Mr. Nutt 06/05/2012 15:38


  10. avatar
    Mr. Nutt 06/05/2012 15:48

    I am at my GF’s house surrounded by Twilight crap. I see this bitch WAY too much. I am starting to think that she is computer generated.

  11. avatar
    Mr. Nutt 06/05/2012 15:56

    She reminds me of Morgan Fairchild ONLY in the way that she didn’t smile either. All to prevent wrinkles. I guess Mr Fairchild didn’t get any head for the same reason, poor bastard.

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    2 fingers 1 Thumb 06/05/2012 16:13

    Is your GF 18? Either way, nice work! You use BING? I am full of questions today. Sorry about that.

  14. avatar
    Mr. Nutt 06/05/2012 16:16

    No, just fucks like one. Yes I use Bing. Google can go fuck itself. Ask anything my friend. No problem.

  15. avatar
    sirlongfarts 06/05/2012 18:10

    I like this chick even more now. An actress that doesn’t act like one.

  16. avatar
    askaskask111 06/06/2012 11:05

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