Courtney Stodden Wears a Hat to Hide the Jizz Around Her Eyes

By Johnny Redd March 05, 2013 @ 2:26 PM

Courtney Stodden wants so badly to be famous. She came to Hollywood as a third stage stripper turned 16-year old naive country girl and married the biggest celebrity she could find, that squat old dude from the crappy seasons of Lost. Courtney proceeded to spread her legs and wait for fame to enter. She’s still waiting.

Courtney’s now in Plan B mode. Show as much skin in public as possible. A disciple of the Shauna Sand school of attention getting, Courtney is likely headed down Shauna’s same path, a Stargate littered with spent condoms, tales of sexist injustice, and one of the Lamas boys buried up inside her crank.

I could be wrong, but I bet when Courtney sits down with her psychic, the crystal ball illuminates Lamas cock and a girl crying about her decision to leave school in the seventh grade.

Photo credit: FameFlyNet

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13 Comments

(13) Comments

  1. WWTDDsux 03/05/2013 14:28

    At what point does this get funny?

  2. william146 03/05/2013 14:35

    HAHA JIZZ ON HER EYES! HAHAH SO FUNNY and EDGY!

    “Courtney Stodden wants so badly to be famous” in a post about her on what’s supposed to be a fucking celebrity gossip site. I hope you’re just a temporary fill-in who doesn’t get paid while they search for someone who can actually do this correctly.

  3. SomeoneluvsU 03/05/2013 14:46

    Lorenzo Lamas?…
    or did you mean cocks of llamas?

  4. emmdee 03/05/2013 15:06

    Whoever wrote that needs to reevaluate their career choice. You’re trying too hard. This gig just isn’t for you.

  5. MacDaddy 03/05/2013 15:28

    I wouldn’t fuck this girl even with the writers’ tiny cock!

  6. Lick-it 03/05/2013 15:31

    SomeoneluvsU…….

    …..that is the question of the hour….but why not both…or all??

  7. RangerLG 03/05/2013 16:07

    Yeah, she’s all natural. Never had any work done.

  8. SomeoneluvsU 03/05/2013 16:26

    Lick-It….
    She’s 18 now…. couldn’t she get famous by releasing a fuck tape?…..
    It worked for Elvis

    (and coincidentally……. I love fuckin)

  9. Ass Mint 03/05/2013 16:32

    Is the writer on meth?

  10. Johnny Stoolpigeon 03/05/2013 17:04

    I shouldn’t have to Google shit to try and understand the joke references

  11. LoK 03/05/2013 17:56

    Courtney could take the same advice as the writers here…a little less padding could go a long way

  12. Lick-it 03/05/2013 18:43

    SomeoneluvsU……@16:26…..

    ….I like your plan……I see no downside, that’s for sure…..

  13. Squabbler 03/05/2013 18:44

    From the neck down, I think she’s pretty damn hot. So I guess the solution is to chop her head off, hypothetically speaking.

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