James Deen makes a living raw-dogging chicks on camera. He’s known for his “boy next door” atypical porn looks and A+ fisting abilities. He tried to break into mainstream films by starring alongside Lindsay Lohan in The Canyons, but that shit flopped like Lindsay’s tits when she’s hoovering up the cocaine remnants across a party pad coffee table.
Just hours after tweeting a blog post about “Super Awesome Anal Sex” with Christie Stevens, James tweeted “Monogamy makes my dick hard.”
Monogamy doesn’t make his moneymaker hard, he’d be unemployed if that was the case. Gang bangs and butt sex in sex dungeons do. Trust me, I’ve seen his work. A lot of it.
Either James is trying to impress some chick he wants to hump or he has a very different definition of monogamy, one that we should all embrace. His most well know relationship was with fellow porn star Joanna Angel, a kinky little tattooed chick-a-dee with the most impressive bung hole skills I’ve ever seen. That girl could recite the Emancipation Proclamation through her shitter and make it moving. James and Joana would take romantic vacations and film themselves plowing their way through the population of Europe; their definition of an Eiffel Tower is a little different than the one in a Paris Travel Guide. And so is James’ definition of monogamy. We women don’t mind a dude who fucks around, just be honest. Maybe not so much with the sheer numbers and holes, just say, ‘Hey, I fuck around a lot.’ We’ll get it.
No.
These long musings have to stop. It think it sounds better on paper than it is actually being executed. 2 styles of articles have ruled this site for years and years. Quick funny commentary on gossip news, and funny commentary on pics/vids of hot girls. That is it. Occasionally I don’t mind the odd movie trailer or something, but stick to the bread and butter. “Why do hollywood guys gt married?!?!” is not a 3 paragraphs I am going to read, and it breaks up the flow of the site. We don’t want a new direction, we want as close to the original as you can get us.
This writing is beyond any help. So the only useful advice i can give is to go kill yourself.
I must have typed in the word buzzfeed when I was trying to reach wwtdd today. I don’t know what annoys me more, the fact you guys (Oh im sorry its 2013, I mean guys and gals) post this pointless shit, or that I am a huge enough douche bag to read it. I keep thinking “there’s no pictures of hot chicks, so there will be a joke here somewhere”. But the joke never came. What would Tyler Durden Do? Well, nothing cause he’s a fictional character. What will I do? Prolly nothing different.
The more interesting question with regard to this story is:
When Deen was ass-f*ucking lindsay while they watched “The Parent Trap”….
……..was he thinking of Hayley Mills….or a young Brian Keith
>with the most impressive bung hole skills I’ve ever seen.<
Hey Beavis, who still uses the word "bung hole" ?