Lindsey Vonn Is In Love With Tiger Woods, For Real

By Lex July 18, 2013 @ 2:01 PM

Lindsey Vonn In August Issue Of Vogue
Love is blind. If you didn’t believe it before, believe it now. Lindsay Vonn could have pretty much any man she wants. She wants Tiger Woods. A heralded sex addict, unfaithful husband, and porn star banger of the highest order. Great golfer, but I heard he also snores. She tells Vogue¬†magazine this month:

“We immediately clicked, you know? It was just one of those things.”

Oh, yes, I know. You clicked. It was just one of those things. It’s so amazing it’s not describable with meaningful words. I’ve seen hookers discuss rimming their johns in more glowing terms.

“It all comes back to being happy. It doesn’t really matter what anyone else thinks; do what you love to do and be happy and that’s it.”

And there you have it. It couldn’t be more true if you read it inside a fortune cookie or saw Khloe Kardashian tweet it with heart emoticons. Just be happy. And, get checked for gonorrhea. I think that last part is a gimme.

Photo Credit: Vogue

wwtdd

(8) Comments

  1. avatar
    LoK 07/18/2013 15:14

    Is it true that chicks fart if you blast ‘em in the ass?

  2. avatar
    RangerLG 07/18/2013 15:30

    Only if they tighten up when you ram it in them.

  3. avatar
    Beylerbey 07/18/2013 15:56

    Right on time. Paige Butcher just came off the Crowd Favorites, so it’s time to highlight a new shark.

  4. avatar
    Beylerbey 07/18/2013 15:57

    I’m thinking this site is run by one of those really pathetic white guys who tried to be buddies with all the affletes in college.

  5. avatar
    PunkA 07/18/2013 16:10

    All I know is that this chick creates serious wind force when she rips one.

  6. avatar
    Admiral 07/18/2013 16:57

    “We just sort of clicked – I was desperate and he likes blondes – it was meant to be.”

  7. avatar
    Hugh G. Rection 07/18/2013 17:18

    Like they say in Texas, a woman’s love is like the morning dew. It’s just as likely to settle on a piece of horse shit as it is on a blooming red rose.

  8. avatar
    RangerLG 07/19/2013 08:54

    Is that her “don’t bother me I’m dropping a deuce” pose?

You must be to post a comment.