Justin Bieber Popped Selena Gomez’s Cherry

By Jack February 04, 2014 @ 4:20 PM

According to the world’s tiniest recording star, he was the very first to boldly go in Selena Gomez’s sacred vagina hole. Justin Bieber was apparently boasting about this feat recently to his posse of Misfit Toys. The deed was done back in 2011 when the two 5’3″ teen divas were first dating. Biebs begged her to let him put his Canada in her Texas. The couple flew down to Palm Springs where gay people and randy seniors have been going to have sex since 1987.

“I knew she was in love with me when she gave me her virginity.”

Not quite a gentleman for poking his little lamby dipstick around and sharing with the world. But maybe it’s that bad boy street cred that has kept Selena coming around to his place as recently as a couple of weeks ago. A girl never forgets her first. Especially when she’s still wondering why the other boys she’s been with since don’t break into tears and scream out the word ‘liar!’ after every ejaculation.

wwtdd

(5) Comments

  1. 658811 02/04/2014 16:43

    totally ruined it. not that this knowledge changes much, she was ruined the second she shacked up with Miley Cyrus.

  2. Beylerbey 02/04/2014 19:24

    Wow, he popped a six that looks more like an enormous eight year old than an adult woman. Well done, sweety.

  3. scorpzilla25 02/04/2014 21:00

    This is bullshit I know a lesser known performer who has toured with Selena when she was 16 ,and watched Selena’s drunk ass get railed out on the tour bus by Forever the Sickest Kids lead singer on multiple occasions.

  4. rdd 02/05/2014 16:44

    Quickest 6 seconds in Biebers life.

  5. Cold Stone Steve Austin 02/05/2014 23:19

    Hah, she told him he was her first because Jonathan Cook was 25 when he popped her cherry and she was 16

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