You can only protest your innocence for so long before the court date arrives and you need to look contrite and beg the judge for leniency as you plead guilty to lying, cheating, and stealing. Joe and Teresa Giudice, of Real Housewives of New Jersey fame, were facing up to 30 years in prison for making up bankruptcy debts, then making a bunch of dough from Bravo and hiding that from Uncle Sam as well. Pretty standard grifter stuff. They won’t get anything close to 30 years, maybe a few months, because America still lets con artists skate with lots of fines and public humblings. It goes back to the old days when the money classes decided they needed to slap each other on the wrist for being naughty natties, but not open the door to the hangings and beheadings reserved for the apple-stealing riffraff.
“I will describe the choices I made, continue to take responsibility for my decisions and express my remorse to Judge Salas and the public. I am heartbroken that this is affecting my family — especially my four young daughters, who mean more to me than anything in the world.” — Teresa Giudice
Now that sounds like a good mom of four young daughters. I hope she describes her choices in a new book that includes some killer recipes for easy lasagna and some advice on what to do with the kids on a summer staycation. Just make sure to keep those book sale receipts, eh, Teresa.
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