Liv Tyler had a nice run. If I had found out my dad was really Steven Tyler, I would’ve packed on fifty, pierced my nose, and started volunteering the swing shift at a Planned Parenthood. With every abortion I’d wonder why that couldn’t have been me. Perhaps I’m more sensitive than Liv Tyler who just went on to model and make crappy movies while looking great for a decade. But time always catches up to us. Especially when we have a big fat ass. It’s just much harder to run.
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